As Summer Fades
by xwinter.phoukax
Summary: Summer faded and fell away like the crimson leaves around the university. As the chipper American sets foot on campus for the first time, he meets a punk who will change his life forever. Rated M for violence and yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it. /I am /so/ sorry, but this story is on hiatus until further notice. Please don't hate us for this.../
1. Day One: It's Alfred!

Note: This fanfic was written by myself and a new friend of mine from Denmark. It's based in modern day and the protagonists of our story, Alfred and Arthur, are in college. Tell us what you think!

Disclaimer: We don't own Hetalia, unfortunately. It belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. Also, expect yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it.

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Summer faded and fell away like the crimson leaves around the university. Freshmen and returning students filed onto the campus just before the beginning of the fall semester. Many of them were trying to ignore a young blonde in an aviator's jacket who was noisily commenting on everything.

Alfred stopped by the McDonalds on campus before heading to his new dorm. He wondered if he would have a roommate while munching on his burger. If he did, what would they be like? A few minutes later, he dropped his trash in a nearby bin and continued to the dorm.

By the time he reached his room, Alfred had worked himself up into a near panic. What if he and his roommate didn't get along? He stood outside the door for several minutes before he could bring himself to even touch the handle.

"I'm being ridiculous," he laughed loudly and let himself in.

In the room sat a guy with golden messy hair, who was sorting everything. His named was Arthur, he looked and acted a little harsh, but he was just like a mussel, hard outside, soft inside. He wasn't wearing the uniform at the moment since he just had arrived as well as the blonde who now stood in the door.

Arthur looked up, his face expression was blank, though, his eyes were almost deadly. He hated sharing room, mostly because last year, it was a dumb freshman who shared one with. And Arthur wasn't good at understanding people with accents. He looked nice, the new guy, wait? Arthur had realized he just had looking at him without saying at thing.

"Well, Hello there" he said.

God damn that sounded stupid. He thought, mentally slapping himself.

The punk then glared away, sighing softly, "So- I bet you are new?"

The laugh died the moment Alfred caught sight of his roommate. Stunned silence overcame him for a few seconds. It messed with his mind how incredibly sinister the guy's eyes were. The last thing he'd expected was hostility from just walking in. He hadn't done anything yet, had he? A nervous smile found its way to his face.

"Yeah, dude. This is my first semester," he said as he walked over and offered his hand, "I'm Alfred."

It wasn't like him to be this apprehensive, but something about striking individual set him on edge.

Arthur looked at him. What should he say? Arthur had never been good around people, which also was the reason why he had no friends.

"Well I see. Looks like we are… Yeah…" Arthur realized it was pretty obvious that they would share the room.

Jesus, as long he wouldn't be a popular jock who's selfish and loves the mainstream music. It was okay, just not his style. Arthur walked around in the room, shrugging slightly, well, this was really awkward... Wait, names?

"I'm Arthur... Arthur Kirkland, and you are, pretty boy?" he asked, raised a brow as he fixed his red tie.

Alfred shied out of the way and dropped his hand. The dude was seriously anti-social. He wondered what had made Arthur this way. His train of thought was quickly derailed after his roommate had introduced himself.

"Pretty boy?" a fair blush tinted his features, "The name's Alfred Jones."

The situation was getting a little more than just uncomfortable. Alfred hopped on his bed and tried to not look as restless as he felt. His previous anxieties were starting to plague him again as he pulled out his iPod. He flipped through his favorite playlist and popped just one of the ear buds in. Alfred was temporarily lost in the beat of his favorite song. Then, he noticed how the track made his focus on Arthur's movements. The blush was beginning to feel permanent.

Arthur was cleaning up everything he happened to find; everything… the floor and every single little corner. He hated dust and all the stuff. After countless minutes, Arthur was done. He had noticed Alfred's eyes were upon him once in a while but he had chosen to ignore it.

Now he sat on the bed, with his beloved guitar with the Union Jack on it. His dream as to become a singer and he did have an amazing voice. Though he never really sang for anyone, which was a shame.

Alfred's scent was filling the room. It was sweet… and nice. Somehow, it made the punk feel safe. He started smiling. Arthur never smiled. He quickly covered his mouth to make it go away and then he started playing on his guitar.

Alfred pulled out his phone after a while. Matthew and Francis were supposed to be dropping a few boxes of his stuff off half an hour ago. He was starting to wonder if they'd gotten lost. He sent Matthew a text and looked back up at Arthur. Alfred's eyes sparked with piqued curiosity when his roommate smiled. His ear bud fell out at he moved to the edge of his bed.

"Dude, you can play? That's totally sweet!" Alfred grinned.

Arthur blinked twice, staring at his new roommate. Those eyes were sparking as stars on a summer blue sky. Like… a miracle. The punk's eye twitched. What…? What he thinking?

Arthur sighed softly, rubbed his eye, "What was your name again?"

Arthur wasn't good at names. He had never been, though he felt really awkward for asking.

Alfred got up and walked over, looking a great deal like an overexcited puppy. He was barely fazed by the way Arthur was looking at him. However, it irked him that the punk couldn't be bothered to remember his name. A mischievous smile found its way to his face as he thought of the perfect way to help Arthur out. Leaning down a bit, Alfred grabbed his counterparts tie and pulled him close.

"It's Alfred," he said, then placed a not-so-delicate kiss on Arthur's lips.

The punk's eyes widened before he kicked Alfred away, moving back in the bed.

"W-What was that?! Are you sick or something?!" Arthur shouted, rubbed his mouth with his sleeve. He was disgusted. Why would he do something like that? "Fine! Alfred! Go back to your own bed and don't ever talk to me again!"

Alfred couldn't help the coy smirk on his face as he backed away. Sure, his leg hurt now from being kicked, but it had been worth it. Arthur's lips had been softer than he had expected. The feeling had sent a shot of pure adrenaline through his system. A familiar tone issued from his phone; Matthew and Francis had finally arrived. He threw the tech on his bed before heading for the door.

"I'll be back in a bit," he winked at Arthur, "So, don't miss me too much!"

"DON'T TALK TO ME!" was the last thing he got to say.

Arthur rubbed his face irritated as he took a deep breath before kicking the wall. He then sat down again, and then lied down. Taking few deep breaths, he realized that he still could feel Alfred's lips against his own.

Alfred stood outside the door for a moment and listened carefully. Judging from the amount of noise, he wondered… had he stolen Arthur's first kiss? He smiled at the thought, and then ran down stairs to meet his friends.

Francis hugged him the moment he sent foot out the door, "Sorry it took so long. We took a wrong turn a few blocks from the campus."

"I misread the street signs," Matthew said and adjusted his glasses.

Alfred ruffled Matthew's hair, "It's fine, dude. It gave me time to kinda get to know my roommate. He's pretty cool."

They unloaded Alfred's stuff from the back of Francis' car and headed back upstairs. It took him a while to find out that he'd left his ID in the room with his iPod. He sighed and knocked on the door.

"Hey, Arthur," he yelled through the door, "Can you let me in?"

Arthur frowned. _'That idiot,'_ he was speechless. It was his first kiss and it was gone, taken by a guy… taken by a stranger. It made him frown and toss his pillow across the room in anger. He wanted to cry, but quickly realized it was useless. What only made it worse was when he heard Alfred's voice. He didn't answer him. Of course he didn't.

He turned on his side, turning the back to Alfred, hoping Alfred wouldn't kiss or touch him or anything like that.

Being ignored was bad enough, but feeling the way he did about Arthur made it worse. Alfred couldn't explain why this hurt him the way it did. The feeling bled into his tone. It was more than apparent to Francis and Matthew who could see the puppy eyes.

"Come on, dude," Alfred said through the door, "Please?"

"Alfred, you didn't do anything to him, did you?" Francis asked demurely.

Alfred shook his head as if to say, 'Not now.'

Arthur was just ignoring everyone. Well, it wasn't the best way of tackling this situation, but he was very anti-social.

Still, he took a deep breath, "The door isn't locked you ass hat, just go in and stop talking to me!"

Francis? Wasn't it his voice? Arthur used to share room with him, the year before, they were pretty good friends after all, but they didn't talk much anymore. Arthur nuzzled into his pillow, frowning.

Francis opened his mouth in an attempt to make a retort, but Alfred stepped on his foot. The resulting glare was silenced by the crestfallen look in his eyes.

"I'll get my stuff… just leave it here, guys," he said.

Matthew and Francis set the boxes down near the door after a moment. Matthew placed a hand on Alfred's shoulder in a comforting manner, and then led Francis away. After they left, Alfred propped the door open with the box that'd been in his arms and nudged the others inside. Once everything was set on his bed, he sat down on the floor near the head of Arthur's bed. He tried to look at his roommate's face to no avail.

"I'm not sorry," he said, the hurt clear in his voice, "I've been waiting all my life for someone like you to come mess with my mind."

"I have no idea what you are talking about. Maybe you are gay, but I am not, am I clear enough now?!" he frowned, "And even if I was, it doesn't mean you can kiss someone without a second thought. You don't even know me! I am not your type. I am not anyone's type... and when I think I am... I am not…" Those last words were shaky as he spoke.

It was clear that Arthur was hurt and angry... really angry. He got out of his bed, walked across the room and picked up the pillow he had tossed earlier, he stared down at Alfred.

"It was my first kiss... that is gone now. I hate you!" He then walked back to the bed.

Alfred got up after him and caught his wrist before Arthur could sit back down. It pissed him off that this guy assumed that he hadn't thought about the consequences of kissing him. What truly angered him, though, was that Arthur was deliberately putting himself down. He wasn't about to let Arthur ignore him now. Alfred pinned his roommate against the wall.

"How could you say something like that about yourself?" He fumed, "and you're right; I'm not gay. I'm bi and you… you are exactly my type."

Alfred pulled his counterpart into a hug that the other could escape from. He hoped that he wouldn't.

* * *

Afterward:  
Things just kind of went haywire from here on out... I'll post the next segment soon.


	2. Day One: Pain and Panic

Disclaimer: We don't own Hetalia, unfortunately. It belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. Also, expect yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it.

* * *

Arthur's eyes went wide, trying to push Alfred away but in vain.

"L-Leave me alone! Now!" Arthur shouted into his face, "You don't know me! You don't know what or who I like! You haven't even talked to me, really! So, don't fucking talk to me before you can behave yourself!" he then kicked his knee up between his legs.

Alfred's head slumped down to Arthur's shoulder with a quiet whimper, but he didn't let go. A solitary tear fell onto Arthur's shirt. It took him several minutes to regain the ability to speak despite the lingering, gut wrenching agony.

"T-then give me a chance," he whispered through clenched teeth.

Arthur stared right into his soul, "We had known each other for less than 5 minutes and you kissed me! I think… twenty, max thirty have passed since we first meet each other. Now, you are talking about love. I don't even know who you are! I will give you a chance when you stop being like that and act like a friend, not a creepy, pedo, rapist, stalker…"

Alfred's legs gave out, dragging both of them to the floor. He ignored the sharp pain stabbing at his gut and looked up into Arthur's beautiful eyes. Sure, the older boy looked angry, but he was also intensely flustered. Alfred tried not to laugh as he ranted.

"Ooh, see that, there," he grinned weakly, "Who needs affection when I have blind hatred? I never said anything about love… I just find you attractive."

Arthur blinked twice before he blushed darkly, "B-But. I-I… Uh..."

He ran out of words. But he did kiss him, right? And another chance? But... What? His heart started to hammer in his chest as his face heated up.

"W-Whatever, you git," he said with a low embarrassed voice as he walked back to his bed side.

Alfred stayed on the floor, curling into a ball. He was mostly just dazed from being kicked. Still, seeing Arthur blush like that was incredible. They'd been close enough that Alfred had heard his roommate's pulse quicken. He wanted to join Arthur, to kiss those soft lips once again. Alas, he couldn't bring himself to move.

"Why'd you have to hit so hard?" he mumbled into the floor.

"No, no, no! The question is… why are you such an idiot?" he replied.

Arthur looked at him right in the eyes; right in the blue... cerulean… crystal eyes. God, how he already had started to love them.

"You are seriously twisted," but the punk said those word with a little smile.

"It's not my fault you're sexy," the American grinned to the floor.

Alfred rolled on his back so he could look up at what he thought would be irritated green eyes. He was surprised at the smile and even more so at how Arthur was looking at him. It hadn't entirely been his intention to make his roommate fall for him. The thought softened the grin on his face into a pleading look.

"Can you help me up? I don't think I can manage it on my own."

Arthur frowned. Why was he so helpless? Did he really want to be close to Arthur anytime possible? Seriously…

A middle finger popped up towards Alfred as Arthur chuckled, "Get your fat ass up by yourself."

Arthur then got down on the floor, lifted his mattress slightly and grabbed a little box; cigarettes. He then walked to the window, opened it and lit one. Of course he wasn't allowed to smoke, but so what? He never asked to get on this school anyway.

"I can't figure you out, Frodo" he said as he took a draw.

"Please?"

Alfred stuck his lower lips out a little and tried to look depressed. In truth, he was trying to refrain from laughing. He rolled over and tried to shove himself to his knees, and then fell flat. Searing agony ripped through his lower half. He unconsciously curled back into the fetal position while trying to recall how to breathe.

Arthur took another draw, walked to Alfred, knelt down in front of him and blew the smoke out in his head. "If I go on a date with you, will you then stop being so pathetic and annoying?" he asked, taking another draw and blew it into his head.

Alfred coughed harshly in response to the smoke and pure shock. Had he been imagining things or had Arthur just asked him out? He gritted his teeth and pushed himself up against the wall. Once the pain subsided again, he grinned foolishly.

"And why would you want to go out with a 'creepy, pedo, rapist stalker' like me?" Alfred winked at Arthur.

"I don't want the 'creepy, pedo-' Argh! I just want you to stop hitting on me. All right? I am not used to it. Not used to be called sexy and all that. AND you stole my first kiss, so we if go out... You will stop, okay?"

Arthur walked back to the window as he waited for an answer.

While Arthur had his back turned, Alfred used the wall to prop himself up, then dropped onto his roommate's bed. He was careful to keep his feet off the covers, however, and tried to listen to Arthur. The sweet scent of the sheets fogged his mind as he buried his face in them. The resulting stupor dimmed the pain. He wondered if Arthur meant anything he'd just said, apart from 'not being used to it'. That much was crystal clear.

Arthur sighed when he never got the answer and turned around.

His eye twitched,"Get the fuck away from my bed! You are unbelievably annoying!"

The punk tried to pushed Alfred off the bed, but he wouldn't want to touch his ass and only touching his back wouldn't move the rest of the body. Though, while pushing, Arthur's hand slipped and he fell over Alfred, lying across his lower body.

"Stop it, dude," Alfred complained.

The man had kicked him and kneed him in the balls. The least he could do was let Alfred stay still for a few minutes. Then, Arthur had to go and fall on him. It would have just hurt if Alfred hadn't realized _what_ had just landed on him. He blushed deep scarlet and stuttered for a moment, then spoke without a thought to the consequences.

"What do you know… even angels fall."

Arthur blinked twice, needing a second to get the whole situation about lying on Alfred and what... Alfred said. It only took a second before Arthur's face turned red as a tomato and his cheek's was burning.

He quickly pulled away, "I-I am certainly not an angel!"

Arthur knew his face was red and therefore, he walked to the bathroom and closed the door. Then just sat down in there, frowning.

Why would he be like that? Calling him those names and being so charming... wait, what? Arthur shook his head as he thought that.

Alfred smiled, stilling blushing, and sat up, "Arthur, are you ok?"

He was worried that Arthur might have hurt himself, and then wondered if he had royally ruined his chances by saying what he did. Still, he was more concerned for his roommate's welfare at the moment. He walked over to the bathroom and knocked. Alfred knew he'd probably be kneed again if he tried to open the door now.

Arthur frowned slightly and let out a sigh.

"I am fine. Just leave me alone, Alfred. I mean it, seriously…" he mumbled before he opened the door and walked straight back to his bed, sat down. His face was still burning red, "I just want an answer now, and if I don't get one, you won't get another chance."

Alfred followed him with a mock sigh, "You really want an answer? Alright... just remember, you asked for it."

He took off his glasses and tossed them onto his bed, then turned to face Arthur. He sank down to eye level just like he had earlier, but this time, he very lightly pushed Arthur down on the bed. Crawling on top of Arthur, he paused to kiss his counterparts throat. A sultry look blazed in his blue eyes when they finally met Arthur's.

"Yes, I want to go out with you," he smiled seductively, "but I can't make any guarantees about leaving you alone."

Arthur frowned, clenched his hand but didn't hit him. He couldn't, his hand would react, and it wouldn't... hit Alfred. But his face heated up once again, he bit his lip hard as he slowly pulled himself away. The punk fell off of the bed and down from the floor, though his legs were still on the bed.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! If you do that again, I will make sure t-to dig your eyes out with a bloody stick!"

Alfred refrained from yelping as the two of them fell towards the floor. He braced his arms out so he wouldn't land on Arthur. The result was a series of muted cracks issuing from his wrists and unintentionally straddling the green eyed angel. He slumped forward until he was lying on his roommate's chest. There was nothing he could do to stop the quiet whimper that escaped him or the slight tremors that shook his shoulders.

He'd done something similar several years ago while playing with Matthew. Alfred was almost certain he'd sprained his wrists again… or worse, what if he'd fractured them this time? Regardless, most of his body was aching at this point. He wasn't sure how much more of this he could take today.

Arthur looked at the American who wasn't moving or answering.

"Alfred..?" He tried again before he lowered his brows.

Was he in pain? Or... what? He really had no clue, he couldn't move or anything. He bit his lip, looked away for a bit.

Alfred buried his face in Arthur's chest and tried to reign in the tremors. He prayed that the punk wouldn't shove him away. His wrists were already swelling somewhat, which worried him. With some effort, he pinned his arms to his chest.

"A-are you trying to kill me?" Alfred asked, sounding winded.

Arthur blinked twice, his eyes then widened, "W-What? Of course not! W-What's wrong?"

Arthur's voice started to shake a bit. He knew Alfred was hurt, somewhere. Arthur gently and slowly pulled away from the bed, but also pulling Alfred with him. His arms were around Alfred when he did so. When Arthur finally managed to sit up, Alfred was lying on his lap and Arthur ran his hands through Alfred's hair.

"Where does it hurt?"

Alfred winced as he was pulled upright. Being moved was entirely unwanted until Arthur messed with his hair. The action was indescribably soothing. Tension fell away in waves, leaving him completely calm. If he didn't know that he needed to ice his wrists, Alfred would have been more than content to stay in Arthur's arms.

"My wrists... I think I sprained them," he grimaced, then looked up and said the first thing that came to mind, "You have beautiful eyes."

Arthur blinked a bit, looked at Alfred's wrists. They were turning several shades of blue and purple. Arthur blinked twice again.

"You are lucky that my-" he stopped when he heard what Alfred said about his... beautiful eyes?

The punk couldn't help but smile a bit. _No. Wait.._ he thought. He couldn't just start to soften for Alfred. Therefore, he quickly pulled the smile off and finished his sentence.

"You are lucky that my Father was a doctor."

"I saw that," Alfred smiled back, "Do you think he'd mind… you know."

He glanced at his hands, which were starting to look horrid. It's been a short fall, but that didn't matter to the blossoming bruises. He shuddered slightly and tried to recall if Francis had packed his braces or not. Alfred was almost certain he had. Francis had thrown a fit the other night because he'd wanted to leave them. He could still hear that snobbish voice, _'You never know when you might need them!'_ Alfred lamented that he actually needed them now.

Arthur's eyes widened slightly, "O-Oh you thought that-"

Arthur lowered his brows and looked down.

"My father taught me a lot.. But uhm.. He died a couple of months ago.." Arthur mumbled lowly.

He gently pulled away, making sure it wouldn't hurt Alfred, and walked to the other side of his bed. He knelt down, pulled out a little first aid kit and opened the box.

"So.. I guess it would be hard for him to help you.."

All humor dissipated from Alfred's face, "I-I'm sorry..."

While Arthur got his kit out, Alfred made his way over and got his glasses. Putting them on was a hassle due to the shooting pain up his arms, but he managed. He rummaged carefully through his stuff until he found the Ace braces at the top of the second box he opened with a note. Francis still didn't understand that Alfred couldn't ready his writing, it seemed. He grabbed them and walked back over to Arthur.

"It's fine. I… Well," he didn't know what to say.

The punk placed his hands on Alfred's shoulders and pushed him down, forcing him to sit down on the bed.

"You shouldn't use your hands, geez," he sighed and grabbed one of the bandages.

"I know," Alfred flinched as he was shoved down on the bed, "but I wanted to be able to see you clearly."

Arthur started wrapping Alfred's wrists with it tightly. Since this just happened, bandage and Ace braces would be good. He smiled and grabbed them gently out of Alfred's hands and gently put them on Alfred, then firmly tightened them.

"Alright, it might get really hot, because of the pain but also because there are so many layers. We should find some ice and don't use them. If you need to do or get something, I will do it," he smiled.

He gritted his teeth when Arthur wrapped his hands. It wasn't nearly as bad as last time. Still, that had been Francis' handiwork. The snob had been less than kind about trying to "help" him. At least Arthur seemed to care about what he was doing. In fact, he noticed that his roommate's attitude had done something of a one-eighty. He hadn't hit his head, had he? Alfred let out a shaky sigh when the braces were in place. He returned the smile, but it felt frail on his face. The world tilted sickeningly in a sudden rush of vertigo and he fell forward.

Arthur hadn't realized that he had changed attitude towards Alfred. The only reason was that he trusted him. Arthur felt that he maybe could be more like himself with Alfred and he felt safe, comfortable even. Maybe he had a friend. Arthur smiled warmly and chuckled at the thought.

"You know, may-" he stopped when he saw the blonde starting to fall forward.

The punker quickly placed his hands on Alfred's shoulders to prevent him from falling. One of his hands ran up to Alfred's forehead. No… he wasn't warm, but it was clear that Alfred was in pain. He tilted the American down on his bed and pulled the covers cover him. He then got some ice bags, placing them under his wrists.

Alfred shivered when Arthur touched his forehead; he wasn't running a temperature, but he was slightly clammy. His vision had cleared somewhat his head hit the pillow, enough so that he saw Arthur walk off. Something close to panic shot through him. It left him wondering about all the 'what ifs' his semi-delusional mind was producing. Such questions led to a realization that Arthur had made, in a very short amount of time, an irreversible impression. The profound relief he felt when Arthur returned cemented the thought. As cheesy as it he thought it sounded, Alfred had fallen in love.

Arthur had no idea what to do. Suddenly it all turned awkward and Arthur didn't know if he should stay or leave; talk or not. So he decided to grab his guitar and start to play, following by a calm singing and a little smile on his lips.

Alfred tilted his head so he could watch Arthur play. The melody had the most lulling quality to it. It was hard to believe how much could change in half an hour. The same punk who had been kicking him away was smiling at him now. Alfred drowsily smiled and daydreamed about asking Arthur to join him. He didn't dare voice these thoughts for fear of ruining the moment. Instead, he waited until the end of the song.

"You should sing more often," he said sleepily.

Arthur sighed and stopped playing completely.

"No, I sing horribly, but I thought... it would help you relax," Arthur mumbled and walked to the corner with the guitar again, "Can I ask you... do you… masturbate?"

The punk knew it was a weird question. Well, almost everyone did, but he was curious.

"I mean, how often?"

The reason was that, Francis did it often when they shared room and sometimes he didn't wash his hands. Arthur often he woke up to it… in the end, it was just a horrible experience.

Alfred meant to comment further on his roommate's amazing ability to sing, but was cut off by a query. The resulting blush started around the base of his neck and reached his hairline. That was the last thing that he'd expected to come out of Arthur's mouth. He stuttered for a moment, entirely unable to manage a complete sentence. It took a few minutes for him to regain anything resembling composure.

"Dude! …why?"

"Well.. " Arthur shrugged, "Let's just say that.. I had some problems with Francis, All right? And don't be embarrassed, i mean.. Everyone masturbate. Even me," he smiled.

_'Though,'_ he thought, _'What if Alfred started thinking about Arthur masturbating? If Arthur was as hot and had as beautiful eyes as Alfred said, he might... think of that.'_

"Well... often?"

Composure quickly flew out the window, "You're the "jackass" roommate Francis wouldn't shut up about?"

The quotations were obvious, despite Alfred being so flustered. The snob had ranted about his roommate all summer and made a point of telling everyone that he'd deliberately gone out of his way to avoid the Brit again. The one thing he never said was a name. Alfred was beginning to consider the possibility that he was hallucinating. The only thing that kept his from believing it was the look in Arthur's eyes.

"I… um… not that often," he admitted eventually.

"Hah! He talked about me? I see… I haven't seen him in a while, though," Arthur shrugged and blinked by Alfred's words, "Really? That's good. Francis did it all the time. I often walked in on him. And you… It can happen once, maybe twice. When it happens seven or more times, I start to get annoyed, you know? God, that guy was only on this school for two reasons; to fuck and to get in my pants. Well, that was what he tried last year. Maybe he has changed?" he shrugged.

Alfred stared at him, wide-eyed and uncertain of what to say next. Francis hadn't changed at all, from what he could tell. About halfway through Arthur's rant, Alfred got up and ran for the bathroom. The last few lines did nothing for the blood dripping into their sink. Francis had tried to do what…? Alfred tried without success to shove the thought away.

Arthur blinked and ran after him.

"A-Alfred what's wrong?" he asked, frowning slightly as he looked at him.

What... happened? Why did he suddenly run? And the blood?

"Alfred, what happened? Are you feeling bad or…?" Arthur stroke Alfred's hair back so it wouldn't get bloody.

Alfred tried to pinch the bridge of his nose, but neither of his hands were willing to cooperate. Thankfully, the blood flow wasn't severe. However, it was beyond embarrassing that Arthur had managed to make this happen. He wanted to faceplant into the floor and try to forget the mental images that the Brit had given him.

"I-it's nothing," he mumbled.

Arthur blinked twice and sighed. "If it was nothing, it wouldn't bleed like that," he said and ruffled his hair before walking back to his bed. On the way he shouted back to Alfred, "Take care of your wrists!" He didn't want it to get worse.

Alfred whimpered out of frustration. _'So much for 'If you need to do or get something... I will do it','_ he mentally grumbled. It took several more failed attempts to put pressure on his nose before he gave up and used toilet paper. By then, his wrists felt like someone had shoved needles in them. He fell to the floor and kept his head forward slightly.

Arthur wondered why Alfred didn't get out and Arthur went back to him.

"Alfred," he whispered and grabbed the toilet paper out of his hand.

The punker pulled him up and dragged him back to bed, taking the toilet paper with him and put him down on the bed. Arthur then started cleaning Alfred's face from blood.

"Alfred... What's going through your mind?" It was already dark outside; the time had really passed quickly.

Alfred let the punk lead him back to the bed without any resistance. He kicked off his shoes once Arthur made him sit down. He remained quiet until the last of the blood was wiped away. Even then, he had no idea how to tell Arthur that he'd been thinking about him without his punk attire. He kept his eyes downcast and stared at his knees. The blush that had been receding returned mainly to his cheeks.

"I-I… umm…" Alfred stumbled over the word, unable to say anything.

"It's fine, Al. You can tell me," Arthur said with a kind smile.

He walked to the trash bin with the blood toilet paper before he sat down beside Alfred with a little smile as he looked at him. It kind of scared the Brit that all this happened, he wasn't used to it, and he had never had nosebleed himself.

Alfred shook his head, making hair cover most of his face. He mostly blamed his half-delirious revelations for his inability to speak properly. There was so much he wanted to say, but couldn't… he was terrified what Arthur think. After all, they'd only known each other for less than a day. That hadn't stopped him from kissing Arthur… it was small in comparison to what the punk was asking him about.

He scooted back on the bed, pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. Alfred was careful not to apply pressure to his wrists. He glanced over at Arthur through his hair, trying to read his roommate's mood.

Arthur face was terrified. He had never dealt with this and he did bleed a lot. He had no idea why and Alfred didn't tell him. He lowered his brows slightly, got up and walked to the toilet to clean the mess up. Also, to think. He came back after only four minutes, but his face expression was the same.

"You stole my first kiss, so I believe you owe telling me this. Spit it out," he said with anger and nervousness in his voice. He was kind of acting like the old Arthur again, still talking about that kiss.

Alfred flinched at Arthur's harsh tone as thought the punk had punched him in the face. He buried his face in his knees to avoid letting Arthur see the tear streak down his face. One of his hands darted up to wipe it away. He had no idea what to say, especially now that Arthur seemed so angry.

"I'm s-sorry," he sniffled, and then the rest came out in a hurry, "I-I was just thinking about...you."

He was tired and today had been a bit too much, even for the typically chipper American.

"What about me..?" he asked low-toned, biting his lip. _Why would he think about me? And why did it affect him so much..?_ "Was it because I said Francis tried to fuck me?" he asked, tilting his head slightly before he sat down again beside Alfred.

Alfred sat there for a moment trying to control his emotions, "Not entirely…"

He hoped that Arthur would back off from the subject. It seemed unlikely though. The punk didn't like to let anything go, from what he could tell. He yawned despite himself, and then glanced at the clock through his hair. He felt fortunate that tomorrow was Saturday; it was past eleven o'clock.

"Please tell me, Alfred. I want to know," Arthur sighed softly, "It can't be that bad, so please. I really hate when people won't tell me... And this really made me worried."

Reality slapped Alfred in the face for a moment. He realized a source of his anxiety as his stomach knotted; he was horribly afraid that Arthur would hit him again if he said anything. Still, he wanted nothing more than for the punk to hold him or even just to play his guitar again. It haunted him that he couldn't find the words to say to make Arthur understand. Being cornered verbally hurt him worse than all that had happened, even being kneed down south.

"D-don't get mad?" he voice trembled.

"Alfred, why would I get mad? Just tell me," he said with a little smiled, wrapped his arms around Alfred's chest and rested his chin against Alfred's shoulder.

Alfred leaned back into Arthur's arms; he hadn't noticed just how tense he'd been until then. He took his glasses off and set them on the bed while he let his legs fall away from his chest. A calm smile graced his face as he nuzzled against the punk's cheek. He wasn't entirely sure how Arthur managed to do this to him, but it was a welcomed change to the day's violence.

"I-I love you, Arthur," he said sincerely, then blushed, "…and I was wondering what this angel looked like without his awe inspiring attire."

Arthur blinked twice, hugging him slightly closer.

"Alfred… You don't know me. Well, maybe Francis told something about me, but… you don't know me," he mumbled, though Arthur's heart were racing for Alfred.

"That doesn't change how I feel," he mumbled, trying to swallow the forming lump in his throat.

Alfred almost wished he hadn't said anything. He didn't want this to happen… being turned away now while wearing his heart on his sleeve. In truth, Francis hadn't really said much other than the 'fact' that his former roommate had been British and a jerk. He wanted to get to know Arthur; so much so that his heart ached.

Arthur smiled softly. God damn, he already loved Alfred as well, right? Yeah. He kissed Alfred's cheek and moved away.

"I think I might love you as well, but I don't want to be together before we know each other," he said with a little smile.

Alfred felt his heart sink. _"Might"?_ Without thinking, he moved to the edge of the bed, slid his shoes on and ran out the door. He didn't pay any attention to where he was going; being still simply wasn't an option anymore. He ran until his legs wouldn't support him anymore and collapsed against a wall. Alfred buried his face in his knees and tried to remember how to breathe.

Arthur blinked, and then frowned.

"So you don't want me to love you? Fine then," Arthur mumbled as he tugged his hair.

It was late. Arthur walked to the bathroom to get ready for bed. Get his clothes off, brush his teeth and all that stuff. The punk put the ice packs back in the freezer and left Alfred's glasses on his bedside table. Then, he went to bed.

* * *

Afterward:  
As I said... haywire. I'm still not enitrely sure how it got out of hand, but it's all good. No ones died yet.


	3. Day Two: Liars and Lovers

Disclaimer: We don't own Hetalia, unfortunately. It belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. Also, expect yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it.  
Note: I keep forgetting to say this, but I'm writing as Alfred while my epic buddy is writing as Arthur.

* * *

Fresh tears tracked down Alfred's face. He wasn't sure what hurt worse anymore… his heart or the numerous injuries he'd acquired throughout the day. _'You asked!' _he mentally yelled, thinking back to the question he wanted to forget. He didn't know how much time had passed before he had calmed down to notice his surroundings. Everything was blurry; he recalled leaving his glasses in the dorm room. Daylight was beginning to hint in the pinkish clouds over head.

Alfred shoved himself to his feet, ignoring the stabbing pain in his wrists, and shuffled numbly back the way he thought he'd came. Images of the green eyed punk flashed through his mind. He shook his head, trying to chase them away, and thought, _'Don't play with me… don't play.' _Eventually, he made it back to the dorm. The door to their room was still unlocked, so he walked in and slid to the floor against his wardrobe. Within seconds, he was out cold with his head on his knees once again.

Arthur did hear him and after a bit, he sat up and looked at Alfred before he frowned, "I seriously don't get you. You wanted to be with me and you say you loved me, but when I say that I love you, you leave me. Just tell me if you just did this to tease me. Thank you, you fucking asshole."

Arthur then pulled the duvet over his head, scowling into his sheets.

Alfred didn't hear a word that Arthur said. He was lost in a dream… rather, what he almost perceived as a nightmare. His dream-self watched the punk playing his guitar and sing what almost sounded like a lullaby. His unconscious eyes glistened with unshed tears, unseen by Arthur.

Arthur kicked the duvet away and walked down to Alfred. He knelt down in front of him and slapped him hard, grabbing his hair and forced his head up.

"What's wrong with you?! Huh?!" he screamed at Alfred, "Tell me!"

The rude awakening was nearly appreciated. Alfred winced as he was pulled partially off the floor by his hair. He tried to smack Arthur's hands away, but only succeeded in hurting himself. His wrists throbbed as he continued to fight the punk's hold on him.

"Let go!" he yelled back, "What the hell did I do to you?"

"YOU-" Arthur narrowed his eyes before slapping him again, "I told you that I loved you, but you ran away! Do you have any idea how it feels!? To be left right when you confess?!"

Alfred went limp and looked anywhere other than at Arthur's face. He couldn't look at those eyes and couldn't bring himself to speak. He'd let the punk beat him into a bloody pulp if it'd make him feel better, but wouldn't forget how it felt when Arthur had sang to him.

"I told you that I loved you! What more do you want!" Arthur slowly tearing up, "I-I love you, Alfred..."

Alfred looked up into Arthur's eyes, then gently wiped away his tears. He knew that it had been the way the Brit had phrased his sentence last night that made him run. The hint of what he thought was doubt. Now, he regretted not staying… not making sure.

"You could let go of my hair," his red rimmed eyes turned pleading, "And prove it."

"So you can run off and make a fool of myself again? Tch... sure," he let go of him and got up.

What if he ran off again? It would hurt even more, but there was no way he would do that.

"I don't wanna make you believe. Either you believe me or not. Because last time I was in love, everything fucked up," Arthur snapped.

Alfred's head hit the floor with an audible crack. He laid there for a moment, too dazed to move. Several minutes passed before he could do anything other than wish he'd not told Arthur to let go. He had to force himself to stay awake and heave himself upright. Everything was blurry. He would have thought it was just from hitting his head, but he'd left his glasses on the punk's bed.

"Arthur, I'm not leaving," he said truthfully; he couldn't even stand at this rate.

Arthur blinked twice, still frowning. He knelt down in front of Alfred's pulled Alfred close before he kissed him deeply, but only for short time.

"But I am mad at you! I will not talk with you again until you apologize!" Arthur said, then went back to his bed.

Stunned to distraction by the kiss, Alfred didn't notice that his hair had matted on one side. The world tilted and the floor came up to meet him as he passed out.

Arthur just ignored him, got into bed and closed his eyes, soon falling asleep.

By the time Arthur woke again, Alfred's hair was partially soaked in his own blood. The American was still unconscious.

Arthur slowly woke up and saw Alfred, in fact. He didn't get scared; he got mad, angry and just wanted to beat the hell out of him. Yet, he called the school's doctor.

The phone rang for a few seconds before a chipper receptionist picked up, "University Clinic, how can I help you today?"

Arthur frowned slightly. "My friend is bleeding... uh, I think it's from his head. We are in room 17."

"Do you know how he sustained the injury?" she inquired, then covered the mic and said something to someone else.

Arthur sighed, "I have no idea what happened"

"Uh-huh," she said, clearly not believing a word, "Zach is heading your way."

Alfred woke while Arthur was on the phone. He felt like someone had used him as a punching bag… then vaguely recalled the night before. He groaned quietly as the light from their window nearly blinded him.

"Okay," Arthur then hung up and frowned, "Bitch"

The punk sat down, waiting for Zach to come. She almost sounded like she thought he had beaten up Alfred.

Alfred shifted slightly to move out of the sunlight. He felt like death warmed over. Everything ached and his head throbbed with his pulse. A knock at the door caused him to flinch, making it all worse.

"Arthur?" he called out uncertainly.

Arthur shrugged and walked to the door and opened it.

"He's over there... I have no idea what happened, so…" he said, walking back to his bed.

Zach could have easily been a quarterback, standing at 6'5" and well-toned. He walked in with his medic's kit and rolled his eyes at Arthur. He'd already heard from Amber that the guy was a bit of an ass, but withheld his judgment until now. Disregarding the ass, he walked over and sat down next to the guy's roommate. The kid was in pretty rough shape. He looked at the bloodied bump on the side of the kid's head; it wasn't as bad as it looked. As he set about cleaning the wound, he glanced over at Arthur.

"Hey you, do you know anything about his condition?" Zach gestured toward Alfred's hands.

The punk narrowed his eyes. Of course he would ask. It was like that every time something happened, he always got the blame. A sigh left him as he folded his arms over his chest.

"I've already told that _woman_ that I have no idea what happened, all right? We had a bit of a fight and when I woke up, he was like this," Arthur explained before realizing he only was standing in boxers.

Awkwardly he grabbed a blanket and covered himself.

Zach snickered at the punk. He'd seen worse at frat parties with his friends, but refrained from saying anything on that topic. The side of the kid's face had him worried. He very lightly touched the bruise on his cheek. The slight grimace was all he needed to not trust the words pouring out of the punk's mouth. He got up and walked over, grabbing one of Arthur's hands so he could judge its size.

"Ya know," Zach glared down at him, "There's not much I hate more than a liar. Why'd you hit him?"

"I slapped him. It wasn't me who caused the blood. And because… it's not something you should know. Alfred is just an asshole and he hurt me."

Well, Arthur was mad and hurt, but Alfred was too. Still, Arthur didn't want to lose pride; therefore, he also tried to act as cool as possible.

"You… slapped him?" Zach eyed him curiously, "Lovers spat? Regardless, get some clothes on and help me move him."

Zach turned on his heel and started moving the boxes off Alfred bed, then discreetly found his sheets in one of them. He thought about the two while he made the kid's bed. It wasn't uncommon to stumble upon a gay couple at the university, but he hadn't seen a physically abusive relationship in his four years of attendance. He glanced down at Alfred, who seemed to have falling back asleep, and wondered if he was about to do the right thing.

"He is not my lover!" Arthur hissed.

The punk opened his closed and tossed almost everything out to find that stupid uniform. Once he found it, he walked off to the toilet and got dressed, brushed his teeth and in fact, just trying to waste Zach's time to be annoying.

After good 30 minutes, he came back with a frown, "Ready Zachie-boy?"

"Shut up before I kiss that foul mouth of yours," Zach smirked deviously at Arthur.

He'd bandaged the kid's head, then cleaned and reapplied the bandages on his wrists while the 'prissy punk' got ready. Zach had been wondering how he'd managed to sprain both wrists, but wasn't going to ask just yet. Lying on the floor wasn't doing the kid any favors. He got to his feet and stood by Alfred's torso.

"Get his feet, alright?"

Arthur nodded and grabbed around Alfred's ankles as he eyed Zach.

"Kiss my foul mouth? Oh, how charming and sweet you are," Arthur mumbled under his breath, "But if you wish to kiss me, just ask. I'd understand," He laughed, "You aren't the first."

Of course he tried to act like a popular jock who everyone loved.-Zach, for sure, knew it was a lie.

Zach snorted, "I don't think your boyfriend here would appreciate that."

The senior looped his arms under Alfred's and hoisted him onto the bed. He took a few minutes to adjust where the kid's arms were and propped his feet up with a spare pillow. Once he'd pulled the sheets over Alfred's sleeping form, he turned back to Arthur.

"Our clinic's too small to watch him, so I want you to keep an eye on him," his tone changed from semi-playful to dead serious, "He more than likely has a concussion, so wake him up every four hours and make sure he can hold a decent conversation with you. If he can't, call us."

He paused to consider how to say what had been on his mind since he'd found the bruise on the kid's face.

"I don't give a shit if this isn't my business, but you shouldn't go around hitting people even if they hurt you first."

Arthur nodded slowly before he heard those words.

"Hitting? Do you have any idea what happened?! Do you have any idea what he said… what he did?! In fact, you are right, it's not your business. You should shut the fuck up and go back being a little bitch somewhere else," Arthur growled

He turned away from Zach and walked a bit away.

"You misunderstood me, kid," Zach shook his head, "He's going to need you for a while. Don't be too harsh on him. I'll be back in a few hours to check on both of you."

Zach headed out the door and closed it softly, hoping the punk would listen.

Alfred had woken up when he'd heard Arthur raise his voice. He'd kept his eyes closed until the door closed, however. He looked over at his roommate, wondering if he was still truly angry about last night.

Arthur stood there for few seconds before he realized Alfred was awake. He wanted to shout at him, yell, scream, and break something. But even though he felt so much anger, he slowly sat down on Alfred bed and said, "Sorry I hit... you."

Alfred had been halfway dreading this moment since the ibuprofen kicked in a few minutes ago. His mind had cleared enough for him to remember almost all of what had happened. He pushed the sheets down to his waist and unsteadily sat up; it was awkward due to the pillow under his legs. Pulling Arthur into a hug, he sighed into his roommate's shoulder.

"I shouldn't have run off last night… I asked for a second chance and I kind of blew it. Forgive me?" he asked, uncertain of what else to say.

Why did it hit Arthur so hard? No one had ever apologized to him, people used to blame him... this time, it was different. He started to tear up, crying softly as he hugged Alfred back tightly, buried his head into his shoulder. He didn't know why. It wasn't only because of this he cried, but he had finally allowed himself to cry so now. He just vented all those pent up tears at once.

"I-I don't even know what happened..! W-Why wouldn't you tell me!?" he cried harder.

Alfred held him close and kissed the side of his head, "Hey… don't cry, love."

There had been so many questions Arthur had asked the previous day, he wasn't entirely certain which one he was talking about. Most of them had to do with his mental health, but Alfred was fairly certain that wasn't what the punk was asking about.

"Ask me again and I'll try to answer, alright?" he inquired, kept his tone soothing.

"When I told you that I loved you, you ran! A-And when you started bleeding, you wouldn't tell me what was wrong..." he mumbled almost silently, resting his head against Alfred and biting his lip hard.

Alfred leaned his head against Arthur's and started rubbing his roommate's back. His memory wasn't really cooperating as he tried to piece together everything that'd happened. He'd been so tired when he'd gotten back; he was still tired, despite sleeping for several hours. Then, it clicked.

"You initially said you might love me," he squeezed his eyes shut, "And… I was afraid that you were just messing with me. I did tell you, though; I was thinking about you. Even when I ran out the door, I couldn't get you out of my head."

His shoulder shook slightly as his forehead fell on Arthur's shoulder. It had never been his intention to hurt the punk.

Arthur just nodded slowly as he leaned against the American before he apologized, "Sorry I slapped you and got so mad. I don't know why I did... I just think all my feelings rushed up and... Yeah…" he sighed, biting his lip before walked to his own bed and sat there. It was a lot colder than being with Alfred.

"I-It's okay," Alfred said quietly, looking down at his hands.

Why did Arthur always pull away? It made him feel utterly empty, almost worthless. His blue eyes misted over as he tried to fight off the impending depression. This wasn't like him, but he couldn't help it. _'I have died every day waiting for him,'_ he thought bitterly, _'and I have no idea how to let him know that I'll always be here for him.'  
_  
"I want you to touch me..." Arthur said, looked at Alfred with serious eyes. No... not sexually, or maybe a little, but mostly to feel their skin against each other. Also, cuddling half naked was maybe what they needed.

"W-what?" he looked up, blushing and trying to swallow back the tears that threatened him.

What had brought this on? Alfred wished he could see Arthur's face clearly. He sounded serious, but the American was roughly half blind without his glasses.

Arthur bit his lip as his face heated up.

"G-Get over here, dummy!" he said.

The punk wanted to feel Alfred's hands against him… so bad.

Alfred swung his legs out from the sheets, then blushed from his hairline to his neck. He knew he hadn't changed last night, so why was he in his pjs? He tried to contain himself as he walked over to Arthur. His pulse sped up slightly as he looked into the punk's stunning green eyes.

Arthur stared right back into Alfred's diamond blue eyes. He smirked slightly, though it only was a façade. He pulled Alfred onto the bed when he was close enough and then pulled his shirt off. Arthur showed off his bare upper body as he took a deep breath.

"Touch me," he breathed.

A shocked gasp escaped his lips as Arthur pulled him onto the bed. He hadn't been sure until that moment that his face could get any redder, but it did as Arthur removed his shirt. The punk was more toned than he'd imagined. He straddled Arthur's lap, wishing he could ditch his own shirt; he knew he couldn't considering the buttons. Leaning in, he kissed his angel's lips passionately and let his hands wander over the punk's chest. They shook at first, then steadied with his growing confidence.

Arthur blushed darkly; god, he love this feeling. He kissed back, slowly, deeply as he leaned back down on the bed and pulled Alfred with him. He smiled more than ever.

Alfred let his angel pull him down, trying not to break their kiss. He pulled away to breath and smiled adoringly at Arthur. Delicately, he placed a kiss over Arthur's heart before nuzzling into his chest. A wave of vertigo refused to let him do anything other than lay there and listen to the Brit's heartbeat.

Arthur ran his fingers through his hair as he smiled warmly.

"I love the feeling when you touch my skin.." he said, blushing, smiling.

God, he loved this; he loved Alfred… loved being close to him.

"W-We got a test tomorrow," he whispered

Alfred sighed contentedly. He would have probably fallen asleep again when Arthur played with his hair, but he was curious. Was Arthur ticklish? Once the short bout of dizziness passed, he started tracing light, nonsensical patterns down his angel's side.

"Tomorrow's Sunday," he mumbled sleepily.

Arthur twitched and giggled, "S-Stop..!"

The punk was very ticklish. He smiled softly, grabbed Alfred's hands and moved them away.

"I know, but it's college placement exams. We did get grades to get in here, but in some tests, you can be lucky by marking randomly, so.. Yeah."

Alfred grinned as his hands were pulled away. Arthur had an amazing laugh and he had plans to use his newfound knowledge later on. Until then, he provided as little resistance as he could to keep his angel from messing with his wrists too much.

"Why should I?" he asked playfully, then thought back.

Testing through the ACT had been an absolute pain. Hours of either staring at an answer sheet or trying to halfway avoid everyone else were one of his definitions of a personal hell. Mattie had been the one to point it out years ago. He noted that despite Alfred's chipper exterior, he didn't go out of his way to be physically interactive. The American mused briefly about how much that had changed when he was with Arthur.

"Wish I'd gotten the memo sooner," he sighed softly.

"Yeah," he said softly, looking at Alfred with a little smile.

God... He was beautiful. Was he allowed to call a man beautiful? Well, he did. He was amazing and he loved every part of him. Arthur then realized he had grabbed the others hands and panicked.

"O-Oh! I grab- I'm so sorry! I was told by Zach that- And I- Argh! It didn't hurt right? I mean, I didn't mean to hurt you. So," he bit his lip.

Alfred had barely felt anything through the pain killers and bandages. He pulled himself up on his elbows. An amused smile graced his face as he kissed Arthur affectionately, trying to assuage his dismay.

"No worries. I'm fine, okay? No harm done," he said placating. Bliss surged through him, but what dampened by one small thing, "Who's Zach?"

Arthur blinked twice, "Zach? Oh, his just the doctor's helper. He came here and helped me with you." He said with a smile, kissing Alfred slowly, and then closed his eyes as he broke the kiss, "Why are you asking?"

Alfred lost himself in the kiss for a moment, blushing lightly. It was so easy to forget everything else when he was with Arthur. It didn't stop him from trying to think back, however. He recalled another voice earlier. That was it… just a voice. He hadn't been conscious enough to really notice much more. It did explain how he'd gotten into his pjs, not that it did anything for his growing embarrassment. Had… had Arthur seen him? What else had happened while he'd been out of it?

"N-no reason," he muttered.

"What? Tell me?" he laughed and kissed his head, hugging him tightly with a smile, snuggling closer "Don't tell me you are jealous? Right?" he chuckled, licked his chin, only to tease him, then pulled away quickly, "Need to shave."

"N-no, I'm not!" Alfred blush went from being slight to deep crimson.

A shiver ran down his spine when Arthur licked him. He buried his face in the punk's chest again and realized that he was a little jealous. It got under his skin a bit; not just about Zach, but Francis too. In an attempt to divert the punk's attention, Alfred did the most embarrassing thing he could think of at the time. He ground his hips into Arthur's.

Arthur laughed warmly, "Are you sure? If you are you can tell.. I mea-"

The punk shut his eyes tightly when he felt Alfred against him. He shivered and suddenly he was speechless, the only thing he ended up letting out of his shaking lips with a little moan. He fell a bit back in the bed

Warmth shot through Alfred's body with Arthur's moan echoing in his mind. He kissed his angel's throat again, his eyes half-lidded. He was hyper-aware of every little movement and sound issuing from the stunning man under him. He hadn't expected this reaction, but the thought of hearing that delectable sound again was irresistible. Smirking into Arthur's throat, he moved his hips again; more delicately this time, yet enough that the sensation was acutely there. Alfred moved up to kiss his angel.

"So what if I am?" he murmured seductively.

Arthur arched his chest forward, his eyes closed before opening them slowly. This… this felt… amazing. He had heard about how it felt to get touched by the one you love, but this… He had never thought it would feel this good. When he felt another, more delicate move, his moan became sweeter, lustier. "Aaah..! Ha.. I-I.. D-Don't.. Know.. Ha.." God, the way Alfred mumbled was sexy. Everything was perfect…

"Arthur," he moaned into his angel's ear.

When the punk had moved, it'd forced him to put some pressure on his wrists. He knew he couldn't keep this up for much longer. Carefully, he rolled over so that when he ended up on his back, Arthur was still between his legs. Lust reflected in his sky blue eyes.

Arthur moved away, down. Alfred almost whimpered when the punk moved away; he didn't want to lose this feeling. The punk undressed Alfred for him, much to the American's surprise. Soon enough, Alfred's clothes were thrown unceremoniously to the floor and he'd lowered himself back to the bed. Arthur didn't care... He kissed down Alfred's body, licking, sucking until he reached Alfred's member. Small, elicit moans escape him as he watched Arthur make his way further down. His hand firmly grabbed around it as he pumped, licking the head slowly, teasingly, he watched Alfred's reactions. Alfred's back arched as his angel grabbed him.

"A-Ah.." he moaned louder and pleaded, "Arthur….d-don't tease."

Arthur slowly stroked the member, slowly and firmly. Once in a while he kissed the tip then smirked.

"You are such an idiot, you know... stealing my first kiss, thinking I will be with you right away and I beat you because of it and now... I'm so madly in love. Bloody hell," he laughed before sucking the head, his tongue rubbing against the head, "Mngh…"

Clenching the pillow, the American panted, "G-god, you're still caught up on that? …It was my first, too."

Alfred hadn't meant for that to slip out. Confessing it brought all the reasons to the forefront of his mind. He'd been hesitant about being physically close to anyone. Now, he was lying unabashed and stark naked on Arthur's bed, lusting after every part of him. He had to fight the urge to buck his hips upward. It was almost as if he'd been branded around his navel, but there was pleasure there instead of pain. He'd never felt this way before.

Arthur took more of the member into his mouth, sucking it, now roughly and he continued for a while before he smiled, kissed his groin and pulled away.

"If you want more, you have to deserve it… what can you offer?" he asked, chucking softly as he licked his lips.

Though… even if they were going to have sex, Arthur had a problem. He was afraid; afraid of almost everything. Showing himself, getting looked at… all kinds of stuff. The thoughts panicked him.

Alfred had been so close when Arthur pulled away, it hurt. He would have complained, but then he saw the look in his angel's eyes. The fear in them put him off almost completely. Worry overcame everything else as he pinned his arms to his chest and sat upright.

"Arthur, are you alright?" he asked, caressing the other's cheek.

Arthur sighed. "I... I wanted sex. I wanted to have you close, but," he paused and looked down, "My body is ugly. I don't want anyone to look at me when I am so… weak. So… nude. W-What if you laughed at me? W-What if…" Arthur couldn't find words.

For a moment, Alfred couldn't bring him to say anything. He'd been warring with himself on one matter that had haunted him the same way. A few years back, he'd refused Francis. The older boy had made sure that he'd never forget. Alfred had just gotten out of the shower when the snob had come at him with a knife and a vengeance. Thin, white scars webbed across his back from that night. He knew what it was like to be laughed at for such things. Arthur's trembling voice bolstered his conviction.

"There is no one else in this world that I would rather be with, Arthur," he said with absolute certainty, then choked up a little, "L-look at my back."

Arthur blinked twice, sighing, "Me too, Al," he blinked again. _Why? What?_ He did as Alfred told him do and bit his lip. "What… happened?" he asked, lowering his brow.

"Francis… back when we were in high school," Alfred murmured, "He'd wanted something I wasn't willing to give up until now…"

He looked at Arthur adoringly, pushing the bitter memory from his mind. There was someone much more important in front of him now. Alfred pulled his angel into a sweet kiss; his eyes shone with true happiness.

"I could never think of you as ugly or weak," he smiled.

* * *

Afterward:  
*hides behind my pillow fort* Nothing major just yet... maybe next time. In the mean time, all violent posts will be met with a plushie grenade.


	4. Day Two: Every day's a new day

Disclaimer: We don't own Hetalia, unfortunately. It belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. Also, expect yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it.

Note: I'm dead tired and I just edited this.. I may have missed a few things. Insomnia decided to take a gun to sleep's head today.

* * *

Arthur blushed darkly and smiled. God he loved Alfred. He kissed his back, slowly and sweetly before he pulled away and lied down beside him.

"Alfred, I... Well... Do you want to have sex with me? I-I know it's a weird question! B-But..." he sighed and bit his lip, glared away.

"…you almost gave me a blowjob and you're asking now?" Alfred nuzzled into his chest in attempt to hide his own blush, "Yes, I do."

"Blowjob?"

That's right, Arthur didn't really think about it but he did. He flushed by thinking about he had… well, given Alfred a blowjob, even though he didn't finished it.

"W-Well… uhm.. Do you have condoms?" the punk asked nervously.

Alfred couldn't believe those words had fallen out of his mouth. He made a mental note to think before speaking from now on and silently prayed that Arthur wouldn't take it the wrong way. It had been a surprising, but intensely enjoyable experience. Although, the feeling hadn't quite dissipated, making him feel slightly awkward about just lying there.

"There's a box over there that Francis packed," he said, uncomfortable with thinking about what the snob might have packed, "T-there might be something in there."

Arthur got up and walked to the box Alfred was talking about. He opened it, biting his lip. The thoughts were rushing through his head. Sex… with Alfred. He grabbed a condom and walked back to Alfred. Arthur sat down on the bed and pulled his pants and socks off. He was only wearing underwear when he crawled to Alfred, though he was hugging a pillow to cover his body while he looked slightly away.

"W-Well.."

Alfred wanted to fall face first into the pillow for a moment. Why had Francis packed those…? His attention was quickly diverted to the way his angel moved. How could any one person be so beautiful and still be so uncertain of themselves? Alfred sat up, trying for a moment to ignore what was going on between his legs, and waited patiently for Arthur to come back to him. He caressed his angel's face, pulling him closer. Between a series of soft kisses, he lightly took the pillow away and let his hands roam across Arthur's chest. He pulled back enough to look into those green eyes.

"You're the most alluring, tantalizing man I've ever met," he spoke tenderly as he wrapped his arms around Arthur's neck, "I love you."

Although Arthur had gone so far as to bloody him up earlier, it didn't matter. He'd still be there for his angel, even if Arthur had a knife in his hands next time. Pain or pleasure, it would never change how Alfred felt for him.

Arthur was like a doll; he didn't move. He was cold unlike Alfred, whose body was warm. When their skin touched, it was like the melted together. He bit his lip, hugging around his belly. He felt fat. And ugly and not worthy enough to be together with Alfred like this.

"A-Alfred, don't look at me," Arthur mumbled.

Damn Alfred, that bloody idiot. It was clear that how Arthur had acted when they first meet, wasn't like him, it was now Arthur was himself the most.. And he was scared.

Alfred's hands slide down to Arthur's. He wasn't entirely sure what was wrong. It hurt him that it seemed like he was being shoved away. He leaned in so that he was close to his angel's ear.

"Trust me," he breathed, barely above a whisper.

"O-Okay.." Arthur smiled softly. He was right; he shouldn't fear this so much. Alfred loved him and his body. He pressed a kiss on his cheek before he nodded, "All right then."

Alfred nuzzled against his angel's cheek and nipped at his ear before he lowered himself back to the bed. He wondered if it had hurt when Arthur had fallen from heaven. The thought sent a fair blush and a small smile across his face.

Arthur blinked as he saw that blush and laughed, "What's up? What are you thinking about?" he asked with a gentle smile before he kissed his cheek, nuzzling close to him.

"Just wondering if God ever gets lonely," he said turning his head so that he ended up kissing Arthur's lips briefly, "After all, his most beautiful angel is here with me."

Arthur raised a brow before he laughed.

"I am no angel, Alfred," he said and kissed his nose, "I have no wings and no halo".

The punk nuzzled into him as he chuckled.

"Denial," he grinned, then bucked his hips upward; Alfred's problem was becoming very distracting with his angel so close.

Arthur bit his lip in response.

"A-Alfred.." he whispered, looking into his eyes.

Alfred's eyes shone with adoration and something edging back toward lust. One of his hands came up to caress the other's cheek once more.

"You're going to hurt your lip, Arthur," he said softly before he leaned upward to kiss the Brit.

Arthur sighed and kissed back before mumbling, "I have no idea what to do... I feel like a doll. I can't move... A-And.. Yeah.."

Alfred's other hand snaked between them and started rubbing Arthur's member through his shorts.

"Don't think about it," he suggested with a kiss.

Arthur shivered and shut his eyes. A whimper left him as he bucked his hips forward.

"A-Aah... A-Alfred.." he moaned already.

Hearing Arthur call his name that way sent a shock of adrenaline through him. Alfred's face flushed further as he smiled. He moved his hands to his angels' waistband and tugged at them lightly.

''A-Alfred...'' he whispered. He slowly cupped Alfred's cheeks and kissed him deeply. His hips started working against Alfred's as few low, embarrassed moans escaped him, "Ah... Ha..."

Alfred moaned into the kissed and a slight shiver ran down his spine. Arthur felt so amazing. His hips arching into Arthur's as he lost himself in the feeling.

Arthur didn't think as he rubbed against Alfred. It felt too good, too good for anyone to understand. Just being with Alfred like this was amazing. He panted as his hips started to get tired.

''I-I want you in me.. I-inside me… Alfred!'' he moaned.

In some vague part of Alfred's mind, he realized that while he desperately wanted to comply to Arthur's requests, taking him dry would hurt his partner. He rolled over again, pinning Arthur to the bed, and kissed him softly.

"I won't be your winter," he murmured with a smile, "Wait one minute."

Arthur's eyes widened. So many thoughts rushed through his head now; so many feelings. He was happy, finally. Alfred made him happy. He made Arthur want to give him everything in the world, no matter what.

When Alfred left him to the box, Arthur looked adoringly at him. God, he was beautiful... handsome. He was flawless; his chest, belly… everything. He had a farmers tan, really. He looked like he had been photo-shopped because it was impossible to be this beautiful.

Alfred got up and walked over to the box that Francis had packed, wondering if he would find what he needed now. As luck would have it, the snob had packed a small bottle of lube. This made Alfred wonder what Francis was thinking when he sent this box along. He unwrapped the braces and bandages on his wrists, giving them an experimental twist. The ibuprofen had nullified most of the pain; a dull, almost nonexistent ache was all that remained at the moment.

Content with this discovery, he walked back over to Arthur and sat down between his angel's legs. Alfred paused to admire the pale man before him, then leaned down next to his ear.

"You said earlier that I would have to deserve this," he whispered as he nuzzled against the side of Arthur's head, "This is the last night you'll spend alone. I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go. I'll be everything you need me to be. Though the years and months may vary, I will always love you."

Alfred soon came back and he spoke. Arthur couldn't help but tear up, now crying. He couldn't cope all these amazing feeling and he wrapped his arms around him tightly before he noticed Alfred's wrist.

''A-Alfred? Your wrists...''

Alfred kissed away the tears, "They're fine, Arthur. Are you..?"

He was more concerned about his angel than himself. Alfred's pain tolerance was fairly formidable; his worry was that this was too much emotionally for Arthur.

Arthur lowered his brows. ''Don't be foolish! I am fine, but Alfred.. Your wrists might get worse, damn it,'' he said, kissing Alfred deeply.

Alfred smirked into the kiss. '…_he does care,'_ the thought shouldn't have been surprising. Still, it had caught him a little off guard. He'd been propping himself up on his forearms to attempt to prevent too much harm to his wrists. For what he was planning, however, that was about to change.

He gently pulled away from Arthur's embrace so he could lean back a little and put a finger on Arthur's lips. Moving down to the waistband of his angel's underwear once more, he pulled the offensive material off, pausing for a moment so he could move out of the way.

Arthur smiled softly at first. God, those touches was amazing. They burned into his skin and he could feel them afterwards. Alfred's finger traced down his body, and then started to remove his boxers. A feeling like an electric shock rushed though him.

Suddenly, Arthur froze, once again but not like before, this time it was embarrassment. He had forgotten to shave, but only his trail of hair from his member to his navel. A little trail of blonde hairs was showing and Arthur's face was turning into a dark shade of red.

Arthur's blush was contagious, spreading to Alfred's face; his was more out of uncertainty and nervousness. This was his first time and he was nearly clueless. If it hadn't been for a few magazines Francis had given him years ago… he didn't know if he would have been able to do this.

Alfred situated himself back between Arthur's legs and was about to make his move when everything went completely out of focus. The room took on a hazy look as Alfred wavered slightly, and then slumped against his angels' chest. His head felt like someone had taken a baseball bat to it as he slipped into unconsciousness.

Arthur's eyes widened while he tried to breathe properly, then moved away from Alfred and made him lay down.

"O-Oh god!"

The punk got his boxers on and Alfred's as well, in case he needed to call the doctor. He was breathing. Of course he was, but Arthur had always been a little to overprotective. He ran his hands through his hair, taking a deep breath and shook him gently.

"Alfred?" Damn it, if it was because of the pain by his wrists, he was so damn stupid. Still… that bloody idiot. "Alfred?"

Alfred groaned in his sleep as Arthur shook him; the action had sent a sharp pain through his head. Little did Arthur know, it hadn't been his wrists at all. Sure, they were still sore and slightly swollen. Unfortunately, cracking his head against the floor twice earlier that morning was what had about done him in.

He bit his lip hard before he ran to the toilet to find some pain killers, just in case. He also got him a glass of water before he came back. He put it on the night stand and gently kissed Alfred's cheek.

"Alfred?" he tried again, stroking his cheek slowly.

It was several minutes before Alfred opened his eyes again. He had no idea what had happened, but Arthur looked worried. The telltale red mark on his lip suggested that he'd been biting it again. Profound relief washed over him as he reached up to touch Arthur's hand.

"Sorry," he mumbled drowsily.

Arthur sighed, "Oh dear.. What happened? How are you feeling?"

The punk helped Alfred sitting up, stroke his cheek again before kissing his lip. He reached over, grabbed the water and handed it to Alfred.

Alfred winced as his angel helped him up, "I dunno… I think I just blacked out. My head hurts a bit."

The American nuzzled into Arthur's touch and returned the kiss before taking the glass. After drinking about half of its contents, he leaned into Arthur's chest. He handed the glass back to his angel, who put it on the table.

Arthur stroke Alfred's hair slowly, gently, with a smile, "Do you remember anything?" He wanted to do if he knew anything about that they were going to have sex.

A fair blush settled across his face as he stammered, "O-of course."

A knock at the door cut off anything else Alfred had planned on saying. He buried his face into Arthur's chest to hide his horror as a French accent called through the door.

"Salut, mon amie," Francis said cheerfully.

Arthur panicked, kissed Alfred's head. He covered him in the blanket before getting dressed quickly. Damn, how embarrassing it was. He and Francis had been in a relationship and they actually never got out of it probably. He walked to the door and opened it.

Alfred hid in the pillow, trying to keep calm. Why had Francis shown up?

Francis' smile faded slightly when Arthur opened the door, "Allo, Arthur. Where is Alfred?"

He looked over the punk's shoulder and noted the American's clothes strewn haphazardly on the floor. Raising an eyebrow, he looked back to Arthur, wondering what had transpired since yesterday.

"What do you want?" he leaned against the door, a little frown appearing on his face, "Alfred is sick and does not wish to talk."

Francis had grown... a lot, just in a year, but why did he want to talk with Alfred? And why did his smile fade like that?

"So-?" he waited for an answer.

"Oh, vraiment?" Francis asked with a sly smile, "That's not what I heard from Zach."

If was possible, Francis thought that Arthur had become even more handsome. It irked him horribly that the punk had clearly chosen an American over him. This wouldn't do.

"I see." The punk just said.

Francis.. Bloody hell! He wanted to punch himself for thinking this thought. He was handsome, bloody handsome. Maybe he loved Alfred, but it didn't mean other people couldn't be handsome. Why Francis though? He looked back, stepped out and closed the door to the room.

"Want to go anywhere and talk?"

Alfred sat up as the door closed. He felt his heart sink when he heard Arthur's question. This couldn't be happening, could it? He grabbed Arthur's pillow, hugging it to his chest, and leaned back against the wall. A silent tear streaked down his face. Was he so easily replaced?

Francis nodded, "C'est bon. There's a coffee shop a few minutes away, if you would like to go there."

Clearly, Arthur and Alfred weren't as close as Zach thought if the punk was so willing to leave.

Arthur knew this might be hard for Al, he was feeling like shit, but he wanted Francis to leave.

"All right," he said, grabbed his phone and texted Alfred.

"Al, I am going to a coffee shop with Francis, don't worry. I will be home soon and I will bring some coffee home to you… I will try to figure out why his here and have a talk with him, all right? I have a CD recorded of me singing, you can listen to me. It's in the drawer.

- I love you

'This might do it,' Arthur thought and left with Francis.

Alfred heard his phone go off. He ignored it until the footsteps disappeared down the hall. Dragging himself off the bed, he meandered to the annoying tech to find around ten unanswered text messages from Matthew and the last one from Arthur. The ones from Mattie ranged from the usual 'hey, how are you' to 'Al… please say that wasn't you running across campus.' With a sigh, he texted Matthew back.

'Yeah, it was… I'm fine. Don't worry about it, Mattie.'

Alfred read Arthur's message and felt the dead expression on his face fall away. He wandered over to the mentioned drawer to find the CD. After he'd collected it, his speakers and CD player, he wandered into the bathroom for a shower. The melody and the hot water soothed away the day's anxiety.

Francis led the way down to his car and offered to drive them to the coffee shop. The weather looked as though it might rain soon, despite the clear skies the reports had predicted.

They drove off to the café. The clouds where dark out here and he wanted to be home with Alfred when it started to rain. He wanted he hug him, listening to the rain. He then looked at Francis and then away. Alfred was filling his mind. Every thought, everything reminded him of Al…

They soon arrived to the café and Arthur got out of the car, rather quickly. Faster out, faster inside the café; sooner done and sooner home… "So, here we are..."

Francis kept moderately quiet during the trip and watched Arthur fidget in his seat. He wondered what was bothering the punk, but refrained from asking just yet. He eyed the punk as he got out of the car, noting how quick he was to get this meeting over with.

"Is something wrong, Arthur?" Francis asked as they walked in. He ordered a black coffee and a croissant for himself.

Alfred eventually got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist before venturing out of the bathroom. He pulled on a fresh pair of boxer and retrieved his pj bottoms from the floor. Once he was decent, Alfred straightened up the dorm a bit. He found his glasses under Arthur's bed. A small smile graced his face as he put them on. He finished unpacking his stuff and settled back down on Arthur's bed, still listening to his angel's CD.

Arthur shrugged. He ordered a cup of tea for himself.

"Nothing," was all he said before trailing down to a table, pulling the chair out and sat down.

And then, it started raining. The only thing he could think of was to get home to Alfred and cuddle up to him, feeling his warmth.

"Why are you asking?" he looked at Francis

"You're still full of shit, Arthur," Francis laughed lightly as he sat down across from the punk, "You seem distracted, mon amie. In truth, Matthew sent me. He was worried about Alfred. Something about seeing him running across campus last night. Zach told me earlier that the two of you had been fighting."

Francis watched the punk carefully, hoping those green eyes would give him away.

Alfred stared out the window as it began to rain and wondered when Arthur was going to come back. He missed being held by his angel. Picking up his phone again, he texted Mattie for a while, then looked back out at the rain. He picked up Arthur's pillow, burying his face in it, and inhaled. Within a few minutes, he decided to go to sleep. Alfred placed his glasses on the bedside table and nuzzled into Arthur's pillow. A pang of loneliness swept through his as he pulled the duvet over himself and looked at his phone again.

'I miss you,' he texted Arthur, then slipped off into dreamland.

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Afterward: Hey guys! A few of you have pointed out that the story is a bit confusing.. it'd help if we knew how it was befuddling you. Thanks to everyone who's reviewed, added us to your favorites or followed our work! You guys are awesome and I hope you keep it up.


	5. Day Two: When you've broken

Disclaimer: We don't own Hetalia, unfortunately. It belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. Also, expect yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it.  
Note: Hey, guys! Sorry about the wait. MTAC is in a few days and I've been scrambling to get everything ready. I will try to post the next chapter before we leave on Thursday. I hope you guys can forgive us in advance for what we're about to do in this chapter...

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Roughly ten minutes after the American had fallen asleep, a knock sounded at the dorm's door. Alfred didn't hear it nor did he wake. The door was opened tentatively by none other than Zach. The medic looked around for a moment, confused when he saw Alfred's empty bed.

"What the bloody hell...?" he thought out loud, then saw Alfred snoring delicately under Arthur's duvet.

Zach left his umbrella by the door and walked over to the boy's sleeping form. He looked peaceful enough, snuggling into the pillow. The medic noted quickly that the braces Alfred had been wearing weren't on his wrists. He sighed and started looking for them. Zach wasn't sure what to think when he found the braces next to an open box of condoms and an assortment of other... items. Perhaps he should have worded his request to the prissy punk a bit differently. He grabbed the braces, and then returned to Alfred's side. It amazed him that the boy hadn't woken up and remained asleep as he fitted the braces into place.

After making sure that the boy was otherwise alright, Zach stepped away and pulled out his phone. Amber had given him Arthur's phone number just in case. He dialed, waiting for the prissy punk to pick up.

"Well.." Arthur paused afterwards.

What should he say now? Francis clearly knew about their fights and it had gotten to a whole new level of awkwardness. He sipped his tea, sighing.

"Well, we had few fights, but it was Alfred's own fault.. He was so loud and just because i couldn't remember his name he-" he felt his phone vibrate, paused and dug it out of his pocket. It was from Alfred. A smile sneaked upon his face as he saw the text, '_I miss you_'. Arthur texted him back, '_I miss you too, Alfred. I will be home as fast as possible.'_ Arthur then sighed. He had forgotten what he just had talked about and a silence took over the conversation.

Soon he felt his phone vibrate once again; it was an unknown number, yet he answered it. What if it was important?

"Excuse me…" he said to the Frenchman and walked off to the door and walked outside, standing in the rain, "Yes?"

Francis listened intently and ate his croissant without really tasting it. The French student had no idea what to make of the emotions flitting across Arthur's face. It made him wonder what all had happened, considering Zach had told him very little. The medic said that, despite the fact that they were in the same fraternity, it was against confidentiality codes to reveal too much. What irritated him was the smile on Arthur's face when he started texting. Who on Earth could have been talking to? Then, the punk's phone had gone off. He'd never been this popular when they were roommates. What all had changed during the summer?

Zach waited until he heard Arthur's voice before speaking, "Hey. It's Zach… I thought I told you to keep an eye on Alfred."

Arthur sighed softly.

"I am sorry, but I do think he can take care of himself. In fact, I will be home soon," he growled.

God, he hated Zach. He was so annoying. Though, he was better than Arthur. He was just sick... and popular. Arthur couldn't help but wonder why. The punk was completely soaked by now; his hair, clothes, everything and it was really cold.

"Geez, why are you like that? It's just his wrists. He is feeling better and I bet he is just listening to some music or relaxing anyway," Arthur snarled.

"What? Worried about the two of you…? How long have you been gone?" Zach snapped back, "He was asleep when I got here. Why don't you two lock the door?"

The medic was getting tired of Arthur's attitude. While he waited for the punk to answer, he noted the quiet music playing in the room. The soft melody the guitar provided was remarkable, but he was stunned by the voice that accompanied it. There was no way… was that _Arthur_ singing? Zach looked incredulously at the CD player. It couldn't be, but it was.

Francis watched out the window and tried to make sense of what was happening. Arthur looked like he wanted to murder the person on the other line. It worried him that his punk was standing in the rain looking like that.

Arthur sighed.

"Listen, Alfred was awake when I left. He could also have locked the door, okay? I can't be responsible for everything just because you hate me," he growled, "No. Sorry, I will get home now. Just give me a moment."

Arthur then hung up and walked back to Francis. He picked up his coat and got it on.

"We have to get back, now," was all he said, staring at Francis seriously for a moment before leaving off to the car. '_Zach is such an idiot, really,'_ he thought bitterly.

Francis caught Arthur's arm as he started to walk away from the table and stood quickly. He'd caught his limit with the punk. Too many of his questions were being dodged and Francis was out of patience.

"What happened? Who called you?" the French student demanded, more out of jealousy and anger than true concern.

Zach smirked as he heard the line disconnect. He hung up and dropped his phone into his pocket, snorting at part of what Arthur had said. He didn't hate the punk at all. On the contrary, he was moderately fond of the foul-mouthed sophomore.

Arthur groaned, "Alfred is my boyfriend. We had a fight and Alfred is hurt, so I have to get home and talk with the doctor-nurse-guy... alright?"

The punk just told him everything right away. He and Francis had once been best friends. While Arthur did trust him, he was just afraid that Alfred might have wanted it to be a secret.

Francis went from being moderately pale to the tips of his ears turning red; rage, embarrassment and envy coursed through him. He kept his hold on Arthur's wrist and dragged the punk to the car. It was all he could do just to get in the car without saying a word or punching the Brit for what he'd said.

Arthur shut his eyes, struggling slightly but not too much. Soon he was in the car, his arm hurt a bit.

"Francis?- What's wrong? I don't understand," he mumbled with a little frown and a confused face expression.

"Shut up," Francis snapped.

The French student drove back to the dorm in complete silence, parking in front of the building. He didn't want to bother with the stupid American of the heart throb Brit for a while. Yet, there was a burning desire to go to their room and beat Alfred senseless.

Arthur narrowed his eyes, glared at him.

"I thought you were over me," he growled before opening the door and made his way to their dorm, their room. Arthur walked in. Alfred was still sleeping. And... he was listening to the song. A smile formed Arthur's lips before he noticed Zach.

Zach had taken a seat at the table while he waited for Arthur to get back. He'd been listening to the CD and watching Alfred sleep. When Arthur came through the door, he'd been prepared to make some sort of crack about how he hadn't expected the punk to be able to sing. Something about Arthur's expression made him swallow the humor; now wasn't the time.

"Hey there, sunshine," he smirked.

Arthur blinked twice. Oh dear god, him… wait. _Sunshine? _Why would he call him that? …Idiot. Arthur walked to Alfred, looked at his face. Yeah, he was sleeping as a rock. Gently he sat down on the edge of the bed and looked at Zach.

"Hello, Zach," he just greeted before looking down.

The punk knew this was going to be fucked; Zach would pick on him for not taking care of Alfred.

Alfred stirred slightly, but was soon snoring quietly again with a faint smile on his face.

Zach snickered, "I put his braces back on his wrists and he so much as flinch. It makes me wonder if it'd take an atomic bomb to wake this kid up."

The medic tried to keep things light hearted. He didn't want to end up having a yelling match between himself and the punk just yet.

Arthur let out a little soft laugh.

"If that was the case, I am scared he would never wake up again," he said, looking at Zach.

Well, he was actually really… sexy? No! He didn't just think that… did he? _Argh…_ he rubbed his neck.

"So, yeah…"

How awkward wasn't it? He just sat there, not knowing what to talk about.

"Are you alright, Arthur?" he asked, concerned.

Zach wasn't sure why he was so worried about the punk. Arthur's demeanor had changed so much since the last time the two of them had talked, it was somewhat shocking. It made the medic wonder what all had happened.

"Huh? Well, yeah," Arthur blinked.

Why wouldn't he be okay? After all, Arthur never changed, but when they meet, Arthur was so conflicted between being mad at Alfred, being slightly sad and suddenly someone was commanding him. But now… it was fine.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm worried about you two; Alfred for his physical injuries and you… because you seem emotionally torn," Zach came clean about his thoughts, hoping he wouldn't piss the punk off.

It wasn't really like him to try to keep tabs on people in this fashion. Still, it didn't stop him from worrying. Zach's heart was saying something slightly different than what his head was, however. Was he really just concerned for Arthur… or was it something more?

"E-Emotionally torn?" Arthur asked, slightly scared, afraid and sad.

"Don't think I can't see it," the medic said quietly.

Arthur knew he was kind of right. Even when he was happy, he was torn. It was just a part of being a teenager, being homosexual and an outsider, right?

"Please don't worry about me, Zach. I am fine." Arthur then offered a kind, kind smile

Zach saw straight through the punk, reading the emotions in those green eyes and the faint quaking in his voice. Why was he so afraid? Honeyed words through the iron bars of Arthur's fear lost their potency. The playful edge the medic had tried to keep slipped away and a crease formed between his brows.

"Not a chance," he spoke sincerely.

"I am just alone," Arthur shrugged, "Because I am not like anyone else. I am not the strongest, the fastest, the more handsome or the sexiest. I don't have the best voice and besides that, I am gay. So, what can I expect?" he mumbled slightly sadly "I also had a boyfriend who cheated on before, if that's what you mean. Why are you suddenly bringing that up?"

Zach hadn't see to care before, so why now?

"We all have our share of faults," Zach said once Arthur finished, "but it's how you chose to live that makes the difference. So what if you're gay? Half of my fraternity, myself included, are as straight as a circle and we get along just fine."

He paused to walk over and kneel in front of Arthur, looking up at the Brit. The medic wasn't about to tell him about his past dating experiences, but there was something else that bugged him.

"And I refuse to believe that you don't have killer vocals," he said with a slight smirk, "There are pros that don't sound half as good as you."

Arthur's cheeks flushed red and he looked embarrassed away.

"I-I... Well, I…" he then laughed, not knowing what to say, "Nah, I am not that good. I just try my best. The only thing that's really bugging me is how I look. I am too fat," he mumbled. Arthur was underweight, so that a load of crap, "And my eyebrows are thick."

Zach sat back against the A/C unit and laughed quietly, "I've seen twigs bigger than you, Arthur."

He looked over at the punk, noticing the blush. He hadn't meant to flirt with Arthur… oh well. The medic understood what he meant about the eyebrows. It looked like they had a life of their own, which was a bit disturbing.

Arthur covered his face as he noticed he was staring at his brows, "Fine! I will go shave them off!"

Arthur got up, trailed off to the bathroom, pouting. He wasn't even kidding, though would they probably grow out again in few days. Of course, he would be wrong, but still… They were so damn big, he had often wondered how he didn't have a unibrow.

Zach got up and ran after Arthur, "C'mon, dude... you know that's not what I meant!"

He would have said something else, but a high pitched yell rang out from down the hall. Whoever it was sounded like they were in absolute agony. The medic ran out of the room towards the source of the noise. Where the hell were the Resident Advisors in this dorm!?

Alfred sat up quickly, startled out of a sound sleep by the scream. He nearly fell back into unconsciousness due to the throbbing pain in his head, but managed to stay awake.

'_Mattie!'_

Arthur blinked when hearing the scream and ran as well. It was just a scream. And yet, it was… unbelievable. Arthur had never heard a scream like that before. He followed Zach, but slowly stopped since it was too hard to run.

Alfred got up and without a second thought to his own health, ran after the brunette who'd just left the room. He was certain that it had been Mattie... he'd only heard his brother scream once, but there was no mistaking it. What on earth had happened?

Zach barged into one of the rooms just down the hall to find Francis holding a bloodied knife, standing over a pale kid who looked a lot like Alfred. The kid was clutching his shoulder, but the medic saw the blood staining his hoodie. Zach pounced on Francis, knocking his now former friend to the floor and wrestled the blade out of his hands.

Arthur finally arrived to the room and saw Francis, then Matthew. He narrowed his eyes. Why would he do that? Why?! Arthur walked to Francis, grabbed him by his shirt and pushed him against the wall, staring into his eyes.

"What the _**fuck **_is wrong with you?!" Arthur asked and punched him several times.

Alfred skidded into the room and didn't so much as see Francis. He rushed to Mattie, kneeling next to him. His brother was crying with blood splattered on his face from his wounded shoulder. Mattie was hyperventilating and it scared Alfred horridly.

"Mattie.. Mattie, talk to me," he begged.

Matthew buried his face in Alfred's shoulder and sobbed. He hadn't known why Francis had been so upset when the French student had walked in. All Matthew had done was say hi and Francis had attacked him. ...what had he done to deserve this?

Zach got up from the floor and pulled Arthur away from Francis, shoving the punk a few steps back. Francis was a real pushover... a few punches and the snob was out cold. The medic lowered the French student to the floor and pulled out his phone, calling campus police. While the phone rang, he turned on Arthur.

"Don't touch him again," Zach snapped, "I left my kit in your room. Take Alfred and... Mattie, was it? Take them to your room and take care of them. I'll deal with this."

It was bad enough that Francis had attacked Matthew. Zach didn't think Alfred could take seeing Arthur being taken away on assault charges as well.

Arthur glared at the medic. Right when he started to think that Zach was nice, it all proved to be wrong. Arthur motioned to his roommate. Alfred picked the crying Canadian up and carried him to their room. What was wrong with Zach and his mood swings? Regardless, they got Matthew to Arthurs bed and Arthur found the kit.

"Uh... What do I do?" Arthur asked uncertainly.

Alfred ended up being forced to sit down next to Mattie; his brother had latched his arms around him the moment he'd been sat down. The American scooted back on the bed and pulled him into his lap. This was so wrong... so cruel. No one deserved this, especially not his soft spoken sibling. Stroking Mattie's hair, he looked up at Arthur. Worry, pain, confusion and uncertainty danced in his eyes.

"C-could you get a wet washcloth? I want to try to get some of the blood off," Alfred was trying to keep his voice from shaking like he knew his hands were, "Arthur, do… do you know why..?"

The American couldn't bring himself to finish the question. Arthur had flown off the handle back there. There was something he knew that he wasn't saying and it involved his brother... who looked like he could have been Alfred's twin.

Arthur got everything he thought they would need and carried it to Alfred. Then, Arthur retreated to the bathroom and smoked a cigarette. He couldn't answer Alfred, not right now. He wanted to be alone with him. He ended up sitting there, crying. So much had happened in, what..? Two days?

Zach waited in the room with Francis until security got there and told them what had happened. His thought kept drifting back to the punk; mainly, back to how angry he'd been. The medic sort of understood what had happened. At least, he thought he did. Arthur had gotten into a fight with Francis over Alfred and taken it out on someone who looked exactly like the one the French student blamed. The campus cops had him attempt to explain everything, and then one of their officers escorted Zach to Arthur's room. The woman seemed nice enough and was clearly worried about the little Canadian.

Alfred wiped away the blood and tears from Mattie's face, trying not to break down. He could hear Arthur crying in the bathroom. It broke his heart that he couldn't do anything just yet. He was about to help his brother out of the bloody hoodie when Zach and a female officer walked into the room. Zach looked around the room and frowned; he sat down at the table, looking like he was about ready to murder someone. The officer walked straight over to him and Mattie.

"Hello, guys," she smiled at them, "I'm Liz. Zach told me a bit about what happened... can I help you two out?"

Mattie looked up at Alfred; the tears had slowed, but he still looked scared.

"It's alright," Alfred said more to Matthew than to the officer.

Liz helped Matthew to the table and gently pulled the hoodie off of the frightened youth. While she took care of the shallow wound, Alfred slipped into the bathroom. The blonde hugged his angel close, wishing he knew how to help.

Arthur pushed the other away, staring down.

"Don't touch me," he said with a shaky voice.

Alfred stumbled back, confusion and hurt lingering on his face, "W-what did I do?"

The punk had almost had sex with Alfred. Now, the American was his boyfriend. They hadn't even had their first lesson yet and so much had happened… Arthur couldn't cope it. He sobbed softly, walked to their room, looking at all the people in there before continuing walking away.

He walked down the hallway, outside and to the gym. There was a pool inside and he could take a swim or something. He got inside and it was empty, all lights were turned off. It looked like something from a horror movie, but he walked in anyway.

He jumped into the water, fully dressed as he tried to think of something else. He kicked his clothes off, until he was wearing boxers.

The American's eyes misted over as Arthur left and sank to the floor. It seemed that he had a talent for fucking things up.

A few minutes passed without his notice. Zach walked into the bathroom, looking worried. The medic was about at the end of his rope with Arthur's bullshit. He knelt next to Alfred, placing a hand on the blonde's shoulder.

"We're going to take Mattie down to the clinic, then go to housing for a bit. He's agreed to crash with me for the semester. Try not to let this get you down, Alfred," he said quietly, then left with the others.

The water was cool and relaxing and he could be alone. Well, it had been until a janitor came and told him that the gym was about to close. He walked into his room and everyone was gone, except Alfred. He looked down, only standing in a pair of wet boxers and holding his other clothes.

Arthur murmured, "I am sorry."

Alfred kept his head down, even when he heard Arthur's voice nearby. He didn't want the punk to realize how much he'd been agonizing over this. Wrapping his arms around his knees, he tried to stop the tears from falling.

"What do you want?" the American mumbled, his voice thick with emotion.

"Sorry," his tone was still low.

The punk knew he shouldn't have left, but Arthur had never been the type who could cope a lot and this was too much.

"It's just… I came this school because everything at home is messed up. And now this… it's so confusing. I realize I am gay and," he sighed before he looked at Alfred, "I know Matthew will be all right."

Alfred shoved himself to his feet, pulling his hair down to cover his face. He walked over to his bed and fell face first into the pillow. He didn't feel like talking about anything, especially not Mattie or their relationship. It'd all been too much too soon.

Arthur noticed that. He grabbed his chin before running the hand to his own neck, the tugged his hair. How should he tell Alfred? Well, he just had to.

"Al, uh… I know you don't want to talk, but I would still let you know that… I'm leaving" he said, sighing softly.

Alfred lifted his head long enough to pull his glasses off and glance at Arthur through his hair. He hoped the pillow had removed the evidence of his momentary lapse in emotional control. This was getting out of hand... He face planted back into the pillow and tried to calm down. It made him curious, though. What was Arthur saying? The American rolled over so that his back was against the wall and looked up at his angel.

"What do you mean?"

Arthur was quiet for a bit, sitting down on his bed, resting his head in his hands as he was trying to find words. He then looked towards Alfred.

"I don't even know you and we almost had sex. It was my fault that Francis stabbed Matthew and it's just.. If it's going to be like this the rest of the school year, I will end up committing suicide." he said with a rather harsh voice, "I was forced to go here so I could have some time alone, see? When I am away from my brother, I mess up. He always knew what I should do.."

"W-what..?" Alfred bit back the words as his emotions seeped into them.

The American couldn't help the hurt expression on his face as his hair shifted away from his red-rimmed eyes. It sounded like Arthur thought of him as a mistake. The thought made him feel hollow, save for the overwhelming, soul crushing waves of depression. Alfred didn't understand much of what the punk had said. How was it Arthur's fault that Mattie had been attacked? The American wanted to reach out to him, touch him... but the fear of being shoved away again twisted his stomach into knots.

"I love you," Arthur said with a soft voice, "I do love you, but I don't want all this drama. Just going to this school was sick.. I don't need it to get worse. You are the only good thing that has happened…" Arthur stared down, "I want to be held by you, kissed, hugged, touched, pleased by you… but Francis would get jealous or Matthew wouldn't think i was good for you. Then one of us will get sick or something. Something bad always happen to me."

Alfred couldn't stop the tear that streaked down his face as he stared, stunned, at the punk. He knew that his brother would never be judgmental of his choices and that Francis... he would likely be a problem for the rest of the American's life. Lyrics from one of his favorite songs ran through his head. _There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain. _He didn't want this to happen; to fall apart in front of Arthur. Yet, he couldn't stop the tears from falling or the lost look on his face. _An ounce of peace is all I want for you. _It was all he wanted for both of them. Just a chance, really, to make everything okay again. He couldn't bring himself to say a word. Emotion choked off every attempt, burying his heart further with anxiety. _Will you never call again?_

Arthur noticed the tears and moved from his own bed to Alfred's. He moved beside him, nuzzling close.

"Do you really want me to stay?" he asked with a low voice.

The punk wanted to, but then the drama had to stop and he wouldn't give it another chance to start again.

Alfred tried to wipe away the tears and moved into the other's touch, "I.. I lost a piece of me in you. I think I left it in your arms. Of course I want you to stay."

The American wasn't sure if he could take the pressure either, but the thought of being with Arthur... it was worth the effort, even if he was discarded in the end. He sniffled, trying to put that last bit of his thoughts far from his mind.

Arthur wrapped his arms around him or a moment before cupping his cheeks, staring into those stunning ocean eyes, "Then I will stay, but only for you."

Arthur felt as though he had to, in fact. He didn't know where Alfred lived. What if it was far away?

Alfred wrapped his arms around his angel's waist, "It's all I can ask for..."

His head fell against Arthur's shoulder. Despite sleeping for a bit, he was tired both physically and emotionally. All the American really wanted at the moment was to cuddle up with his angel and go to sleep. '_But now I know my wounds are sewn because of who you are,'_ he thought with a faint smile.

Arthur kissed Alfred's lips and closed his eyes. He was tired and he knew Alfred was as well, and they had a long school day tomorrow as well.

* * *

Afterward: By the way, I'm going to be taking up another story in the near future. The poll for it has been up for about a month and no one's really paid it much mind... think we could fix this? Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed!


	6. Day Two: Heaven

Disclaimer: We don't own Hetalia, unfortunately. It belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya. Also, expect yaoi in later chapters. Don't like it, don't read it.  
Note: …my time management skill are atrocious. I'm going to beg for forgiveness now for what I'm about to do to Alfred. Please don't kill me? Does anyone want to see some of the pics we took from MTAC? I got an awesome shot of a nurse!England and punk!Wales. They were great and the cosplays kicked ass.

* * *

Alfred returned the kiss and smirked as he tickled Arthur's sides just for the heck of it. His stomach, it seemed, had other, less than playful ideas. It growled loudly, causing the American to blush in embarrassment.

Arthur laughed, but soon he was quiet once again. The silence didn't last long as he heard that and ended up laughing loudly, right from the heart. He wrapped his arms tighter around Alfred ad kissed him gently, slowly as he kept giggling. How adorable.

Alfred's face turned several shades of red before settling on a deep scarlet. He smiled shyly, happy to hear his angel laughing. It was a welcome change to all the drama. In return, however, he began to mercilessly "attack" Arthur's ticklish spots.

Arthur shut his eyes and only laughed even louder. His laugh was adorable, right from the heart each time when he laughed like this. He tried to grab Alfred's wrists, but it was in vain.

"A-Alfred! S-Stop!" he tried but continued laughing.

He felt so fragile in Alfred's hands, so small. And he felt that Alfred was his hero, that he would always protect him.

The shy grin quickly turned a bit devious, "Why should I?"

Alfred showed no signs of stopping, but kept his advances playful. After a moment, he leaned in and kissed Arthur. Sliding his legs off the bed, he went to find the bagels Mattie had packed. His stomach snarled again while he dug through the 'fridge. He grabbed a bagel and a can of coke, then walked back to the bed with his snack.

Arthur was panting heavily, a hand on his chest. It hurt from all that laughing he wasn't used to. His shirt had been pulled from the struggling and his other hand was resting at his belly.

"Ha.. Ha.. A-Alfred.. You will.. regret this.." he mumbled, closing his eyes and gulped.

Alfred smiled around the bagel and sat down with his back against the wall. It took him a little bit to finish off the bagel and about half the coke before he sat the can down again. His eyes twinkled playfully as he eyed the disheveled punk, who ran off for a bit to change into dry clothes.

"Oh?" he asked teasingly once Arthur had returned to his bed, "And how's that?"

"Are you sure you want to find out?" he asked, sitting up with a smirk.

He knew that Alfred would regret it. Just knew it and Arthur would enjoy seeing Alfred like that. And then, Arthur would also hope for something to happen.

"Y-yeah," the American responded.

Alfred tried to keep the smile on his face, but something about Arthur's smirk made him nervous. Butterflies, or maybe it was just the caffeine… whatever it was, his stomach fluttered in response.

Arthur nodded and got out of the bed to stretch. He then crawled on the bed, to Alfred, sitting in front of him, biting his own lip before licking it. He then brushed his hair away, leaned down and nibbled at the zipper to Alfred's pants. Arthur's hand caressed his inner thigh. He opened the pants with his teeth and then tugged them down.

"Mmmh.." the punk hummed.

The blush returned full force as he watched his angel, "Ah... Arthur?"

Arthur looked up at him, making eye contact. His emerald green eyes just staring; clearly showing lust, love and need. He licked the member through the fabric. He wondered if Alfred would find it as a turn on, so why not try it? He licked and sucked the member through the fabric of the underwear. It only got harder and harder. Lust-filled sounds escaped him. His hand started playing with the balls gently from the other side of the underwear.

Alfred unintentionally fell back on his pillows. His eyes closed momentarily as a quiet whimper escaped his slightly parted lips. It'd caught him off guard, but it felt so good... The whimpered turned into a breathy moan as his angel fondled his most sensitive areas.

The punk smirked. Of course, Arthur did everything he could to turn Alfred on.

"Mmmh… so hard already?" he chuckled and pulled the underwear down.

The member was already harder than Arthur had thought. A chuckled left him as he let the member rest against his cheek, before tilting his head and licked up the length, slowly. He loved hearing Alfreds moaning and he moved back, grabbing around the member.

"Do you regret?" he asked, smirking. He pumped it slowly as his thumb played with the foreskin

Alfred attempted not to react too strongly, but failed in the end. His back arched ever so slightly into Arthur's grip.

"N-no," the American panted slightly.

"Mmn.. You will," he chuckled.

The punk stripped out of his shirt and pants, now only wearing boxers. He kept playing with the foreskin before jerking it again, first slow, then quicker and quicker. Arthur slowly leaned down, teasing the tip of the member with his tongue.

"I doubt it...ahh," the words jumbled a bit and turned into a low pitched mewl.

Alfred hoped through his lust-clouded thoughts that his angel wasn't just teasing him. He reached up and laced his fingers into Arthur's hair, pulling ever so gently.

Arthur rubbed his tongue at the head before slowly taking the member into his mouth. It quickly filled his mouth, but he continued and then he sucked, bobbing his head quickly already as he played with his balls.

Alfred swallowed convulsively as words failed him. He could barely think straight while Arthur continued his ministrations.

Suddenly, he pulled away.

"Do you want to be inside me?" he asked before spitting at the member

A low keen found its way from him when his angel pulled away. All he could do was nod, almost helplessly, in response to Arthur's question.

Arthur smirked as he moved away from Alfred. He got fully dressed and trailed off to his bed, sitting down with a book and started to read. He didn't even say a word.

Alfred stared at the punk for a while, trying to piece together what had just happened. The tips of his ears burned as he realized that Arthur _had_ been teasing him. Pulling his underwear back on, he marched to the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He sank to the floor, ignoring the discomfort caused by the action.

Arthur looked up. He guessed he would just need to masturbate. In fact, he had never had sex with Alfred and he wanted his first time to be special, not all of sudden. He would want to cuddle with him long time before and turn each other on by touching each other fully dressed.

Alfred sat there for a moment and tried to calm down. His head throbbed with his pulse; the dull ache was made worse by his rapid heart rate. Dizziness overtook him as he slide down so that his head was on the bath mat. Vertigo swept over him as he desperately tried to stay awake. Within seconds, he passed out.

Arthur waited… and waited. But he never came out. He walked to the door, knocking.

"Alfred?" he called out, but there was no answer.

He tried to open the door, even though he knew it was impossible to open from this side. He ran to the medic's room and hammered on the door.

Zach yawned and pulled away from Matthew's sleeping form. The Canadian had insisted on literally crashing with him after a nightmare had plagued his dreams. The medic shuffled over to the door and opened it. He looked sleepily at a panicked Arthur.

"What happened this time? Alfred PMSing?" he asked rubbing at one of his eyes.

"Uh… I don't know! But he is in the bathroom and isn't responsive! You have to help," he said, lowering his brows.

"Wonderful..." Zach groaned, and then turned to grab a small black bag from the pantry.

He walked back up to Alfred's room with Arthur and sat down in front of the bathroom door. The medic pulled out a tension bar and a few various other tools from the bag and began working with the tumblers in the lock. It'd been a while since he'd had to pick a bathroom lock, but pretty soon, the tumblers aligned. He opened the door a bit, then sighed again.

"First," he said, looking at Arthur, "Don't tell anyone I just did that. Second, he's unconscious and his foot's up against the door. We'll hurt him if we open it all the way now. Third... why is he just wearing his boxers?"

"Of course, I won't. Oh... I see," He smiled, "And well-" he froze as he blushed darkly.

"I-I was giving him a blowjob.." he answered faintly.

The punk was hoping Zach wouldn't hear it, but he knew he did and got Arthur was embarrassed.

Zach shoved himself to his feet and smacked Arthur upside the head rather hard. He glared down at the punk. He clenched his hands into fists at his sides to refrain from hitting Arthur again. Exhaustion burned away quickly with his anger.

"The kid has a concussion, Arthur! What the hell?" he snapped at the punk.

Arthur stepped back but up against the wall.

"I-I didn't think it would affect it! I'm sorry!" he lowered his brows, afraid if Zach would beat him up, "A-And I had forgotten! I just... I-I…" he was stunned, he had no idea what to say.

"That's your problem, isn't it?" Zach was trying very hard not to yell at this point, "You don't think!"

The medic sighed heavily, shaking his head. He didn't want to fight with Arthur, but this was ridiculous. It was _common sense_ that such an injury would be affected by heightened blood pressure. Unfortunately, common sense was becoming a real rarity in the world.

"I-I am sorry," he apologized, taking a deep breath, "How will we get him out?"

Arthur tried to change the subject. In fact, he did know he shouldn't have done it. His father had been a doctor, after all. But he didn't think. He just wanted to touch Alfred, to pleasure him.

"It's not _me_ you need to apologize to," Zach huffed.

He turned his back on Arthur and knelt by the door again. Bending his arm at a somewhat odd angle, he managed to shove Alfred's foot out of the way. The medic motioned for the punk to follow him; he'd played soccer and upper body strength had never been his focus. He needed help moving the American.

Arthur followed, but was a little lost. What should he do? Where should he grab? "U-Uh what should i?.. Uh.." he felt like that no matter what he said, it would be stupid. He sighed as he waited for a reply

"Same as last time," Zach sighed, "Get his feet and I'll get his torso."

The medic prayed that Matthew wasn't this accident prone or he'd be in for a world of trouble later on.

Arthur nodded and grabbed around Alfred's ankles, lifting them from the floor.

"Got them. Just to the bed?" he asked, looking at the older in front of him.

"Yeah," Zach mumbled.

Zach hoisted the American from under his arms and carried him to his bed. The medic was getting really tired of their bullshit. Between Canadian imposed insomnia and this crap, he was about to lose it.

Arthur sighed as they finally got Alfred up on the bed.

"Zach… Can I get a time? I mean, I think I need a doctor," he looked down, embarrassed

Zach looked over at Arthur, looking tired, and raised an eyebrow, "What'cha mean?"

The medic covered the nearly naked American up and sat down at the table. He didn't really want to move for the time being.

"I think I need to talk with someone about all my problems, because if I don't, I will get mad at someone again. I'll blame them and stuff... I need to get my head cleaned."

Zach gestured to the seat across from him, "Alright. Want to sit down and tell me what's going on?"

"Uh, I don't want to be in same room as Al. If he wakes up," he mumbled.

"You did quite a number on him this time," Zach resisted the urge to faceplant into the table, "I can pretty much guarantee that he won't be waking up anytime soon."

'_Shut up,' _the punk thought.

Arthur sighed, "It's just… I know you hate me and stuff, but I feel like everyone hates me..."

"Arthur, I don't hate you," the medic spoke sincerely, "Just the way you handle some things."

"I know I am bad at handling everything. I've had a horrible life, so I never learned _how_ to handle it. And now, there's Alfred; the first good thing. Yet again, I don't know how to handle it," he confessed.

Zach listened intently, taking note of everything the punk said. He didn't want to interrupt again. At least, not yet. The medic glanced over at Alfred while Arthur was talking and saw the slightest of changes in his REM pattern. Glancing back at the punk, he didn't let on that he'd seen a thing.

"And... I don't know. So much has happened in my life, I just want to be happy now," he said faintly, looking into Zach's eyes.

With a sage nod, Zach met Arthur's gaze, "What's stopping you from achieving that happiness?"

The medic was curious, but he was also asking for the American's sake...

"I don't know, but whatever I do, it's not good enough… from grades to social issues and I can't better because I am depressed. On top of that, Francis likes me, but I like Al, and then Francis hurts Matt because of me. I am a source of sadness." Arthur had hardly paused long enough to breathe during his rant.

"I'd avoid calling Matthew by anything other than his name," Zach suggested, "All the same... you need to do what you know is right for you and hope that everything else falls into place. Francy-pants is currently in custody and Matthew will be just fine."

"But then something else will put me down. I have tried to commit suicide twice, but that didn't go as planned. Nothing ever goes as planned…"

Zach sat there, stunned for a moment. Conviction steeled his heart for the questions he knew he was going to ask, but was almost afraid to hear the answer to.

"How?" he asked, keeping his gaze locked with Arthur's, "And why would you want to go out that way?"

"How…? First time, I ate pills, but my organs started to set out, so i ended at the hospital for 3 months. Second time, I-" Arthur paused for a moment, "I was hanging myself. I did die, but as I told Alfred, my father was a doctor. He saved me".

Arthur sat there for a moment, started to feel the rope around his neck again before answering the last question.

"And why I wanted to die? Well..." He leaned back, "I had a mom, a dad and a brother. The perfect family, supposedly. Nah... my brother was always better than me in everything. I knew I could just study more, but I was too sad. He had a nicer body while I was a little chubby. So, I trained hard. As you can see... I couldn't stop. Then, I meet some rough guys. They asked me if I could get them some weed and I could. Suddenly, I was popular, so I did everything they told me to. I started drug peddling and took drugs myself. One night, I was high and a guy touched me. I liked it though because I didn't know what was happening. My father had found me on the sidewalk and he had to push the guy aside. I am glad he did that… Still, I feel horrible."

Zach listened without judging Arthur's choices. The punk's story wasn't unlike one he had heard a dozen times while working at the clinic as a counselor. While he couldn't empathize with the ones who had attempted suicide, Zach was able to sympathize with where Arthur was coming from. His home life wasn't the best for a few reasons. Still, there was one thing that worried him about the situation and he wasn't sure if the punk had heard it... a half-choked whimper from Alfred's bed. Zach knew he'd been awake for a while; long enough to hear all about Arthur trying to end his life.

Obviously, Arthur hadn't heard a thing. And since he didn't get an answer, he continued since he thought Zach was waiting for something.

"You know, it's just... You have to be really miserable to want to end your life. And it wasn't like I didn't want to live, I just wanted to end the pain. I know it's selfish, but… why not? I didn't know Alfred, I had no real friends... Nothing. I had my dad, who died. After his death, I wanted to try again. I guess you could say it was a suicide attempt. I was out walking to get some fresh air. Allistor and I had just come home from dad's funeral. After a while, I didn't know where I was. I walked until I found an highway. I remember seeing a truck and staring at its wheels before the time came, then I ran towards them. I was sure I would die… but instead of getting under the truck, I hit the wheel and fainted."

Zach sat back in his chair, still looking intently at Arthur, "I'm starting to wonder if I shouldn't introduce you to one of the kids that's supposed to come down to the clinic tomorrow. He's had some similar problems, but most of his have to do with when his parents divorced. I've met with him a few times already and saw his attempts at ending his life; the kid's arms are covered in more scars than I'd care to count. He says it's getting better, but I'm not so sure sometimes."

_'Scars?'_ Arthur thought. Well, he did have many scars, but not on his arms. They were on his thighs, where it was easier to hide them. Even Alfred hadn't seen them. Scars are awful and Arthur thighs looked like something that had got burned 100 times because of cutting. It sounded like an idea, someone with the same problems huh? Arthur tilted his head to the side and brushed his hair away. He had a scar from the rope.

"I have this one," he lied as he gestured to the rope's mark, "But I would like to talk to him."

"Ya know, you're still really easy to read, Arthur," Zach said with a sad smile.

The medic was certain that there were other scars lingering on the punk's pale frame. He sighed, standing and heading for the door.

"I left my number on the fridge the last time I was up here. Text me if you need someone to talk to," his gaze shifted to Alfred, "The kid's right there and he's been awake for a bit."

Zach walked back to his room and crashed next to Matthew once again.

Alfred stayed under his comforter with his arms pinned to his chest. That was supposed to be confidential information... and Zach had just told his angel. And yet, Arthur had spilled something even worse to the odd brunette.

Arthur sighed and looked at the _sleeping _Alfred. He stroke Alfred's cheek.

"I love you so much, Al.. You are my world, my universe, my heartbeat… everything," he leaned down and kissed his forehead, "But someday, when you wake up… I won't be here anymore. I won't be anywhere except heaven. I would wait for you. I will finally be that angel whom you love so much." He sighed, "I can't tell you when you are awake. I don't want to see you cry. I know it's selfish, but I don't want to be the reason for failure... for everything that's bad. I love you, Alfred Jones. I will always love you," he whispered, kissed his lips before walking to his own bed, snuggling under the covers and curled up.

Alfred felt the tears fall silently down his face when Arthur turned his back. _How could he say such things!?_ The American knew what he wanted to do... he'd stashed a few razorblades in a small stuffed polar bear Mattie had given him and his wrists itched. The sensation was almost maddening as he shoved at it, trying desperately to make it go away. There was something more important right now. He got up, wiped the tears away and walked over to Arthur.

"C-can I sleep with you?" he asked timidly.

Arthur blinked. Shit. Had Alfred heard it…? Maybe. He couldn't think of it now, he just moved a bit so Alfred could be there. He just wanted to be held close again; feelings Alfred's warmth. Wait, Arthur had said that… _'Someday when you wake up, I won't be here.'_ Could it be the reason that he would sleep with him?

"Of course you can," he answered.

Alfred slid under the sheets and snuggled close to his angel, holding him close. He kissed Arthur's soft lips. When he pulled back, the saddest look lingered in his blue eyes.

"I just want you to know that no matter what, you always have somebody here for you. Always. I'm never going to leave you," he said quietly.

"You heard it? How much?" he asked, holding Alfred's hand. Kissing each and every fingertip before moving into his arms.

Alfred's eyes misted over as he looked at his love, "...pills, Arthur? Really?"

Arthur curled up a bit, "W-What was I supposed to do? I was scared and i just wanted to sleep forever. It's so hard because I still want to die, but there one thing I want more. It's you. Still, I am not sure if I can live like that," he slowly teared up, "I need to feel that you are real.." and then he cried.

Alfred wrapped his arms around his angel, pulling Arthur close, and nuzzled into his hair. He knew how Arthur felt... wanting to sleep forever. It had been a few years since that once September, but he still remembered how it felt to bleed out. That time, Matthew had been with him when he woke up. His brother had made him want to live on and now... he didn't want to lose this, the way he felt or the one person who mattered most.

He ran his hand through Arthur's hair soothingly and kissed his forehead, "I know... I know, but I'm here for you and this is real. I love you."

Arthur closed his eyes as Alfred ran his hand through his hair. It felt nice… relaxing.

"I-I know it's real. Everything is real; the pain, the sadness. I hate reality and you are real, but to me, you are more like a dream... an unreachable dream," he looked into Alfred's eyes as tears threatened him once again and whispered, "I am not good enough for you. You are my dream, my heaven, and I want to die... so I can be with you."

Alfred listened and kept petting Arthur's hair. He smirked into his angel's hair, thinking back to a play Mattie had taken his to all those years ago; The Man of La Mancha. He wasn't a crazy knight or anything, but one of the songs just fit this moment. So he was an unreachable dream, huh?

"I guess that's my goal in life, really," he said after a moment, "To dream the impossible dream... because even the most impossible things can become a reality. To fight the unbeatable foe, such as loneliness or depression. Even those emotions can be overcome by happiness and love. To bear with unbearable sorrow simply because one day there's always going to be something that makes everything better. And to run where the brave dare not go. I'm willing to go the distance... as long as you're with me."

Arthur smiled, "I wish I could go with you, but I would eventually stop. I'd fall and fail; I'd keep you from your dream. I had a dream once," he mumbled, "I wanted to find the one I love. I have now; it's you, but Alfred... you don't understand," he sat up, covered his face.

Alfred tried to keep the hurt from his face when Arthur moved away. He understood more than what his angel was giving his credit for.

"I don't get it. I am a teenage boy who is thin, suicidal, a punk, and an outsider. And you are tall, sexy, tanned, handsome… even your voice is hot. …why me? Why not some pretty girl?" he asked feebly as he fell back into the bed and moved close to Alfred.

The American wrapped his scarred arms around Arthur once again, considering what he was about to say.

"That's the best part, isn't it..? Finding a new dream, a new reason to keep going," he smiled adoringly at Arthur, "Why you? Because no one else is as charming, awe inspiring or handsome... and no one will ever hold my heart the way you do."

Alfred grinned, looking slightly embarrassed, "Plus, girls aren't my type."

"So… you'd mind if I would wear a short, tight dress?" he asked with a little shy smirk.

Arthur leaned over. He didn't truly want to die. He knew that Alfred could and would save him, if worse came to worse. He moved in, kissing his chest. "Alfred.."

"W-why would you do that?" Alfred asked as he attempted not to laugh at the mental image he was getting.

He failed miserably and his face turned a dark shade of scarlet. With Arthur so close, he was certain that his angel heard his pulse quicken.

Arthur laughed.

"Some guys would find it sexy," he glanced up at him, "Would you?"

The punk chuckled and kissed his hero's chin.

Alfred looked even more flustered at the question, then frowned slightly. Why would he want to see that? A dress paled in comparison to what he'd seen earlier, after all. Arthur was perfect the way he was. The American shifted slightly and kissed his angel.

"Perhaps," one of his hands dropped to caress Arthur's side, "But why cover this up at all?"

"W-Well.. I just thought you would think I'd be sexy if I wore a short dress and gave you a lap dance while stripping," he laughed

Alfred hid his face in Arthur's hair and mumbled, "I'm beginning to think you enjoy doing this to me..."

The American was acutely aware that he wasn't wearing anything other than his boxers. This didn't help matters...

Arthur hugged him tightly.

"I am sorry," he whispered, closing his eyes, "I am still a little sad… we should sleep."

Alfred moved Arthur's arms and rolled over on his back, pulling his angel on top of him as he moved. He hummed contentedly as he pulled the duvet over them. Kissing Arthur's forehead once more, he wrapped his arms around his angel.

"Don't be sorry. Sweet dreams, my love," he said quietly, then picked up a lilting melody, "Rains will pour down, waves will crash around... but you will be safe in my arms."

Arthur blinked and smiled warmly when he felt the kiss. He then closed his eyes and rested his head on the others chest. His hand wandered across Alfred's bare chest briefy. He closed his eyes and slowly fell asleep

"N-Night..." the punk murmured as he passed out.

Alfred was half asleep before he realized his CD player was still going. _'It's too late to get up and turn it off now,'_ he thought, smirking slightly. Between the melody and Arthur's soft breathing, he fell into a deep, peaceful sleep.

* * *

Afterward: Thanks to everyone who's stuck with us and reviewed! I'll try to post the next bit soon...


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